The depressed son asked: What is the meaning of life?

By chance, I was attracted by the title of a WeChat video: \”The professor\’s son was depressed and wanted to commit suicide. My words helped him find the meaning of life.\” I thought to myself, you are just talking big. Just a few words can help a severely depressed teenager find the meaning of life. How is it so powerful? I was very curious, so I opened it and took a closer look: Mr. He Lingfeng, a famous psychology professor and doctoral supervisor, said: A professor and his wife from Fudan University brought their child to him. A 14-year-old boy suffered from depression and cut his wrists and jumped off a building several times. Fortunately, he was discovered in time and wanted the psychology professor to talk to his son. Boy: Teacher, do you think people will die sooner or later? The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High and High School] premium VIP course catalogs from famous teachers in various disciplines on the entire network, click to view now! Professor: Yes. Boy: I am 14 years old now. My parents are both university professors. I have experienced everything I should eat, play, and go since I was a child, and I have no regrets in life. If I don\’t die now, I will take the high school entrance examination next year. If I don\’t get into a good school, my parents will feel very embarrassed. After getting into a good high school, you need to get into a good university, and to get into a good university you need to study for a master\’s or doctorate. No matter how much I read, I may not be able to read as well as my parents. Besides, I studied like them. Look, they are both professors now, so don’t they also live like that? Isn’t he just a social animal? You see, their relationship as husband and wife is not good either. They quarrel and have cold wars all day long. What’s the point? I don’t want to have children. It’s so worrying to have a child like me. Then you have to get married, work, raise children, be judged by society, and be whipped by society. Why should I be tortured by society and then die? Well, I\’m going to die sooner or later anyway, wouldn\’t it be nice if I died now? The professor said: Think about it, yes, life is so difficult, and living is indeed meaningless. However, you might as well play games every day! Boy: Playing games is not interesting. I have played all kinds of games, and I found that that’s all. Professor: So don’t you have anything interesting in your life? Boy: Just go to the cat cafe to volunteer for two hours on weekends. Kind of like cats. The professor finally said to the boy\’s parents, after chatting for an hour, I really can\’t convince your child and there is no way to convince him. Your parents are anxious and you refuse to convince them, what should you do? The professor suggested giving your child a cat. People may not be able to keep him, but cats may be able to keep him. The professor concluded: If you want a person to live a meaningful life, you have to let him establish a link with this society. Tell me how I feel. When I first saw this title, I was very surprised: What words can help a person who is so depressed that he wants to die find the meaning of life? I think it\’s difficult. Sure enough, the psychology professor did not say anything to help the children find the meaning of life. (I guess the title is just a headline. However, the title of the short video is the same as the title of the advertisement. Otherwise, no one will read it.) Why is it so difficult to persuade people? Because the meaning of life is lived, not spoken. If a man, a child, is determined to die, do you think he has not thought of all the things we want to tell him? For example, child, if you die, have you never thought about how uncomfortable your parents must be? How sad is your friend? Don\’t worry, he must want toThe mood of parents and friends. You say there are good scenery, he has seen it; you say there is delicious food, he has eaten it. If you jump off a building, you will fall beyond recognition; if you cut your wrist, it will really hurt! However, there is nothing you can do to make his life meaningless and boring. He has no love in his life. I have read two books about depression. The etiology and pathogenesis of depression involve neurology, endocrinology, neuroimmunology, sleep and brain electrophysiological abnormalities, genetics, psychosocial factors, etc. The above case seems simple and even a little ridiculous. In fact, I think the child\’s condition has reached a very serious and dangerous state. Once an extreme event occurs, the blow to the family will be fatal. It\’s terrible! Well, depression is too complicated, so I won’t talk much about it today. Today I will mainly talk about the question that the children asked Professor He: What is the meaning of life? This is really a question, a philosophical question. Yes! No one can escape death anyway, so why live? There are two types of people asking this question. One type is the rich kids who live a carefree life and have a clear mind. They solved material problems as soon as they were born, and some wise minds began to ask such philosophical questions. The other type is those who are frustrated, confused, have no idea or are at the end of their rope, have been repeatedly hit, and want to give up on life. Those who live a fulfilling and happy life, have hope and goals in their hearts, and work selflessly for work, career, and wealth, generally do not ask such questions, or have no time to ask such questions. Because they themselves live in meaning. So, how can people live in meaning? I have thought about it many times and I believe that the deeper the connection with the world, the more meaningful life will be. To put it simply, the connection with the world includes three major aspects: 1. The connection with people. 2. Link with nature. 3. Links to things. If a person has established deep emotions with his parents, brothers, sisters, spouse, and friends, caring for each other, and helping each other, I dare say that this person must be happy and have a full sense of meaning in life. If a person is deeply infatuated with nature, he can have in-depth communication with nature, walk among mountains, forests, lakes and seas, comfort and appreciate each other. I dare say that his life has a full sense of meaning. A person has his own hobbies and a small piece of his own world. For example, he loves sports, loves to play chess, loves to dance, and loves to read… He lives a noble, rich and interesting life every day. I dare say that he lives a happy life. Feeling at ease and contented, life has a full sense of meaning. Every little baby is born with a natural desire to live. But when they grow up, why are so many of them depressed? A young man who suffered from depression in high school and later was admitted to Fudan University talked to me. He has studied adolescent depression for several years in his spare time. He said that in addition to congenital depressive traits, adolescent depression is closely related to the family environment in which they grow up: Parents Too strong, long-term hot and cold violence, too much control, too high expectations, the pressure on the child exceeds his own endurance. I especially want to say that among depressed teenagers and teenagers who have lost the meaning of life, no family relationship is harmonious, or the relationship with their parents is harmonious and sweet. Just like the parents of the 14-year-old boy who consulted Professor He, you two should stop quarreling so often.The Cold War is going on. Don’t always expect your children to get into high school. Focus on self-change and improve the family environment. It is better than dragging your children to this consultation or that consultation. We can be strong ourselves, but we should not force our children to be strong. You must know that everyone in society who lives a strong life enjoys life on the one hand, but is also very tired on the other. It is understandable that you want to be strong and live a glorious life, but you must allow your children to live an ordinary life. It is not how we think it is good to live. The next generation will have their own way of living. People, self-consistency is the best! Every life is important. No matter what a person is capable of doing, everyone can have a world of their own. Every life can find the meaning of its own existence in the world.