The father is the source of strength for the child

On January 1 last year, the \”Family Education Promotion Law of the People\’s Republic of China\” was officially implemented. It clearly stipulates that in the implementation of family education for minors, parents must participate together and play their respective roles. The father\’s participation in family education used to be just a call and aspiration, but now it has risen to the legal level and has become a legal requirement and obligation. For many years, I have emphasized that father’s education is very important for the growth of children, especially boys. In life, I have noticed more than once that most fathers and mothers behave differently when raising children. For example, in the square, a little boy was playing skateboard. Suddenly he accidentally fell to the ground and burst into tears. Under normal circumstances, mothers will rush to help their children, but most fathers do the exact opposite. He will encourage their children: \”Don\’t be afraid, son, stand up by yourself.\” Perhaps it is the father\’s relaxed and confident attitude that has infected the child. Children, children usually get up quickly and are happily playing again after a while. Differences in parental education methods are related to personality differences between the two sexes. Famous psychologist Carol Gilligan believes that in terms of how to connect with others, women tend to focus on connection and tend to be over-protective; men tend to focus on separation and encourage children to explore freely and be independent. It can be seen from this that in a family, father\’s education is indispensable. Especially for boys, if their father exists and actively participates in family education, the child\’s courage, confidence and courage will be stronger. In recent years, with the rapid development of social economy, the divorce rate has been rising. Coupled with the involution of the workplace, the employment pressure has increased, and the phenomenon of overtime is common. This has objectively caused the absence or vacancy of the father\’s role and the father\’s involvement in education. time and willingness are greatly reduced. What are the serious consequences of a father’s lack of education? A fourth-grade primary school girl in Shanghai commented on her male classmates: \”I think some boys in our school are not manly. They always look delicate and talk more like girls than girls.\” \”Boys are more feminine\” The main reason behind the emergence of this gender dislocation phenomenon is the lack of father’s education. CCTV recommends over 500 high-scoring excellent documentaries. Children watch the pattern explosion and self-discipline addiction. The most important way for boys to grow into men is to imitate. Fathers provide boys with male role models and behavioral models, such as how to treat others, deal with problems, care for women, etc. Boys imitate their fathers subconsciously, and when they mature mentally, they will strive to reach or surpass their father\’s height. However, if the father\’s role is insufficient or even absent, it is possible that some unhealthy male role models in society or in movies and TV dramas will take advantage of the situation. Psychologist Gerdi said that father is a unique existence and has a special power in cultivating children. The power that the father gives to the boy can be understood from two levels: First, the sense of power on the psychological level, that is, confidence. Confidence comes from my father\’s appreciation, support and encouragement. The second is the sense of strength on the physical level, which is the child\’s physical health. When I was giving a lecture, I once met a distraught father. He has worked out of town for many years, and the responsibility for his son\’s upbringing falls on his wife\’s shoulders. My wife attaches great importance to her son’s studies and will severely criticize him if he misses even one point in the exam.. Under such strict requirements, my son ranked among the best throughout elementary school. But what I didn\’t expect was that after only a few months in junior high school, my son, who failed in a quiz, suddenly seemed like a different person. He was quarreling with everyone he saw and refused to go to school. After detailed inquiries, I gave several suggestions: He should find a way to transfer back to work locally, ensure adequate time for his son, and actively participate in family education to relieve his wife\’s anxiety with his actual participation and actions. Change the educational philosophy of learning only. At the same time, we enter into the child\’s life in the form of understanding and empathy to resolve his frustration and rebellious psychology. For example, it is not limited to study, but observes small things, discovers the child\’s strengths and praises them in time, so that he can gain confidence and strength from his parents\’ affirmation; you can also take him to do physical exercises, such as running, playing ball, etc., to help the child understand during sports Competition and confrontation, victory or failure, chance and necessity, and many other elements gradually improve children\’s ability to withstand stress. Half a year later, the father reported to me that his child had returned to school and the relationship with his parents had eased a lot. In order for boys to draw more strength from their fathers, fathers should have a sufficient presence in family education. Spend more time with your children so that they can truly experience the supportive influence of their father on them. Fathers must also learn and be brave enough to express love. A hug, a smile, a cup of hot tea, a word of encouragement, etc. can greatly satisfy the child\’s sense of security and allow him to explore the unknown world more boldly. As time goes by, the importance of fathers becomes more and more obvious. Compared with mothers who are better at handling specific affairs, fathers may have a broader vision and are an important way and means for boys to understand and go to the outside world. The emergence of artificial intelligence has greatly subverted the operating model of human society. The acquisition and memory of knowledge in traditional education are no longer the focus. The integration of knowledge and the cultivation of innovative abilities are the trends of future talents. When encountering problems in life, fathers should encourage their children to try more, let them know that there can be different solutions to the same problem, and cultivate their children\’s divergent and innovative thinking. In the process of solving problems, the will and quality will be exercised, and capable thinking can also be cultivated. As a boy grows up, courage is the energy center for moving forward and the sharp sword for overcoming obstacles. If he has his father\’s company and encouragement, this energy will become his motivation to brave the wind and rain throughout his life.