The more controlling the mother, the more rebellious the child becomes. Why?

The September mythical beasts finally returned to their cages, and the parents secretly rejoiced. However, as various learning problems arise one after another, parents are anxious. There is a joke circulating on the Internet: If you don\’t do homework, your mother will be kind and your son will be filial. This paragraph vividly illustrates the academic conflicts between parents and children. ​Many parents hope that their children will be self-disciplined. They believe that children are very young and ignorant and must be disciplined to become self-disciplined. In fact, strict discipline and excessive control are both a form of mental pampering. They can only deprive children of their right to act and think, and cannot cultivate self-discipline. Children\’s self-discipline is the ability to be self-responsible developed by constantly making mistakes, constantly learning, and constantly having choices. Everyone yearns for freedom, and adults hate domineering bosses who will leave as soon as the boss leaves. Just like a child who hates a strict-controlling parent, if I can\’t confront him head-on when it comes to homework, I will resist softly and keep procrastinating. In addition, parents’ over-controlling nature of seeking advantages and avoiding disadvantages makes children learn to evade responsibilities. Especially when it comes to learning, the more parents push and control, the children will think that learning is their parents\’ business and will lose their initiative. Therefore, control cannot form self-discipline. The more you control, the more rebellious you will be. Behind self-discipline is freedom. Behind freedom is the unconditional love of parents. Love and favor are two different things. Love is unconditional support and acceptance. The greatest use of love is that a loved child is willing to face the outside world, because she knows there will always be a family that loves her. This family gives the child strength and nourishment and is the driving force for her life. When children make mistakes, we must look at them from a growth perspective. Parents need to guide their children to learn to grow from their mistakes. Parents should resist the desire to teach their children how to do things correctly or correct their children\’s mistakes, and keep them \”at arm\’s length\” and lead from a distance. When a child makes a mistake or gets into trouble, help should be provided in time to avoid attitudinal frustration, but do not make the child dependent. Give your child a sufficient sense of security. Do this to let him know that there is no danger in doing so and that he can try it bravely. It doesn\’t matter even if he makes a mistake. All 15 volumes of the original English version of Diary of a Wimpy Kid can be read online in ultra-clear pdf + mp3 + 4 movies. When a person has unconditional love, he will have autonomy, positivity and sense of accomplishment, and he will be responsible for his own choices. Responsibility naturally leads to self-discipline. However, in today\’s era of involution in education, parents have become more and more controlling over their children. They hope that their children will spend every minute and every second on learning, and they hope that everything will follow their own arrangements. Many parents are puzzled by the fact that children who were obedient and obedient in childhood become extremely rebellious when they reach adolescence, and they seem to be completely different people. The more obedient they are, the more controlling they become, and the more controlling they become, the more rebellious they become. Unknowingly, parents have embarked on a vicious cycle. In fact, this kind of control comes from the parents\’ deep sense of inferiority and the deep fear that they will be abandoned when their children grow up. A child\’s independence is like losing a leg to them. Many parents gain a sense of accomplishment from controlling their children. As their children grow older, this type of parent increasingly feels the need to tighten the noose behind their backs and maintain their children\’s dependence on them. let the childThey can maintain this control by feeling like they are still a child. Such children will grow up to be giant babies throughout their lives, unable to take responsibility for themselves and others, and it is even less likely to develop good habits of self-discipline. Therefore, in the process of raising children, parents must continue to learn and grow, learn to be self-aware at all times, and cannot project their self-awareness onto their children forcefully, and reduce excessive control and discipline. Children\’s self-discipline requires giving them love and freedom, fully trusting them, believing in them, giving them the right to choose, and cultivating a self-responsible attitude towards life. Let them not be afraid of the difficulties in life and move forward courageously, so that they can find their own meaning of life!