The most failed parents are those who set rules for their children and then break them themselves.

Linlin, the neighbor\’s little girl, is two years old. She got cavities just after her teeth grew. When she went to the pediatrician for a dental appointment, the doctor said that her teeth were not good and she was prone to dental caries. In addition, she ate a lot of sugar and the caries was already severe. After coming out of the hospital, Linlin\’s mother bought special dental appliances for children and urged her to brush her teeth on time. Brushing her teeth does help, but I think it would be more effective for Linlin\’s mother to let her eat less chocolate. When Linlin could just speak, she fell in love with Wonderful Eggs by chance, and she couldn\’t control herself ever since. Every day I pester my parents to buy them funny eggs. When I come back from get off work, I go through their bags and cry when I can’t see the funny eggs. Wonderful eggs are made of chocolate, and eating too much of them is bad for your teeth. Linlin’s mother set a rule for her to only eat them once a week, but she failed to stick to the bottom line every time. Linlin is a stubborn little girl. She must be satisfied with what she wants to do, otherwise she will lose her temper, cry all kinds of things, and sometimes even lie on the ground and roll around, unable to be helped up. Linlin\’s mother couldn\’t bear to see her making such a fuss. When she started crying, she hugged her and went to buy it. She also went to buy it when she was sick. If she was in a particularly good mood one day, she had to buy it. When I go to my house to play, I always have a funny egg in my hand. If you eat too much chocolate, you will have problems with your teeth. By the time you discover them, the dental caries are already very serious. Now every day I listen to Linlin crying heartbrokenly next door and clamoring for eggs. I feel very uncomfortable after hearing this. If she had set some rules for her from the beginning and followed them firmly, the situation would not be so bad. However, I also know how many mothers can bear to let their children suffer. There are only a few who can remain unswayed by their children\’s coquettishness and cuteness. Our failure is to set rules for our children while breaking them ourselves. It is precisely because our words and deeds are inconsistent that it is difficult to control our children. When it comes to other people\’s problems, I speak clearly and truthfully, but in fact, I am not much better than Linlin\’s mother. My child is a car enthusiast and has been fascinated by car toys since he was a child. He asked me for toys when he was less than one year old. It doesn’t cost much to buy toys, so I don’t think it’s necessary for my children to suffer. And I think that as long as I satisfy his need for toys, he will feel safe, know that I can be trusted, will listen to me, and will not act out and wallow in order to buy toys, which will make me lose face. I have to say, I was too naive. The baby is only two and a half years old now, and the house is already full of cars. They come in various models, sizes, colors, materials and styles. There are several engineering teams, big and small, and even ten large storage boxes cannot hold them. The living room is overrun with toys and it drives me crazy every time I put them away. I started to set rules for my baby. There are too many cars at home, and I can only buy toys other than cars in the future. He nodded sensibly, but when he saw the car toy, he still couldn\’t walk. He stood in front of the toy cabinet, holding on to the new model car without saying a word. When I pulled him, he held the door open and refused to leave. At this time, I just felt so many pairs of eyes staring at me, which made me feel hot all over, so I had no choice but to buy him a toy. The baby was holding the toy and looking at me with a smile. To me, that smile looked like the smile of a bad guy who succeeds. I was very puzzled. All my needs for toys were met. The rulesHe also knew why it didn\’t work. \”How many times have I told you, why are you still disobedient?\” Does this sound familiar? Yes, this is the mantra of many parents. However, have we ever thought about why we have said it so many times but it has no effect at all. The children still go their own way and make us angry. The problem is that we talk too much and do too little. After the variety show \”My Mom is Superman\” was broadcast, Ma Yashu was bombarded by netizens, and her way of educating children became the target of public criticism. Netizens said that good children who were taught by her to become devils would be destroyed by her sooner or later. Although Ma Yashu also came forward to clarify, saying that due to editing issues, broadcasting out of context would cause misunderstandings, but it is undeniable that she is indeed the most unprincipled of several mothers. Ma Yashu said that she is \”a very compromising mother\”, and her various performances in the show indeed confirm this statement. Daughter Mia is an independent girl and very willful. In the show, she had a conflict with her mother because she didn\’t sleep. She kicked her mother with her feet and refused to apologize when she was forced to stand. When she was too tough, she launched a tear attack. Ma Yashu quickly gave in and went to bed with Mia in her arms, and the beating was settled. She snatched toys from her younger brother, bullied him, lied, etc. Ma Yashu saw all these things, but did not educate her in time. She said she couldn\’t do this or that, and what she said meant she didn\’t say it. Although Mia is less than four years old, she has already figured out Ma Yashu\’s weakness. She knows that she doesn\’t need to take anything her mother says seriously. As long as she wants to do something, she will think of various tricks, using both soft and hard tactics, and she will succeed every time. It can be said that Mia\’s poor discipline has a lot to do with Ma Yashu\’s lack of principles. The most taboo thing in educating children is that words and deeds should not be consistent, and what they say does not mean what they say. However, many parents are like Ma Yashu, only wise in the first half of the step, and too weak in the second half. The rules are set, but they are always not enforced. The children become soft-hearted when they cry, so that they are led by the nose. Not only is the adult tired, but the children have not developed good habits. Yu Minhong also talked about setting rules for children. He said that his son used to just throw the paper on the ground after wiping his nose. He told his son not to do this and asked his son to pick up the paper. The son did not listen to him and deliberately threw it again to make him angry. His wife felt that there was no need to be serious with the child and just let him pick it up, but he disagreed. So, in the middle of winter, he locked his son away. The son may have been scared and knocked on the door after a while. Yu Minhong asked him why he came back, and he said he came back to pick up paper. It worked so well that his son no longer threw paper on the ground. Yu Minhong\’s approach seems a bit cruel to many parents. They feel that there is no need to care about their children, so they turn a blind eye to many of their children\’s bad behaviors and do not take them seriously. What we don’t know is that if our words and deeds are inconsistent, we are telling our children that they don’t need to listen to what we say, and then our authority as parents will be gone, and the effectiveness of educating our children will naturally be affected. And after countless compromises by us, the child will become self-centered and only focus on his own desires. He will not learn to respect rules and respect others. And ifIf our words and deeds are consistent and our words are true, our children will get a clear message from us that we have a bottom line, and his behavior must be within this bottom line, otherwise he will be punished. Every time we stick to this bottom line, children can develop a sense of security and know what to do. Making children happy is something every parent wants to do. But if the child\’s happiness comes from breaking the rules, that\’s not advisable. There are many rules to abide by in the adult world, and there will be no shortage of setbacks. If a child cannot restrain his behavior and learn to obey the rules when he is young, he will suffer many setbacks in the adult world when he grows up. We need to teach our children to behave through actions, not words. If you forget to bring your homework, please don\’t rush to school every day and send it to him; if you procrastinate on homework, don\’t keep urging him. If he can\’t finish his homework, the teacher\’s criticism will let him know how to do it; just for fun It\’s too late and there is no food to eat when you get home. Please don\’t cook for him alone. After a hungry meal, he will know when to go home. He may seem cruel, but he uses practical actions to let him know the consequences of his actions and teach him how to make the right decision. There is a saying that says, \”If you are extremely cruel, please love especially.\” I agree with this. Parents must be cruel. When our children grow up, they will understand our cruelty and deep love. If you are too lenient with your children and do not keep your words, then please be stricter. The rules you set must be firmly implemented, so that your children can learn to obey the rules and respect you through your strictness.