The sad record of helping left-behind children in China: no one cares when they are alive, and no one knows when they are dead

A few days ago, I watched a Japanese movie \”Nobody Knows\” that was released in 2004. The movie\’s scenes were very refreshing, but the content was very cruel. The protagonist of the film is Ming, a 14-year-old boy who is the older brother of three younger siblings. These four children are all gangsters, and they have the same mother and half father. The children\’s mother was an unstable person. One day she left 200,000 yen and a letter and left. After being abandoned by her mother, her life was very tight. Today\’s soup had to be saved for rice the next day. Water and electricity were also stopped one after another, so she had to go to the park to steal water. To make matters worse, her youngest sister fell to her death at home. When my mother was still alive, she lied to her sister and said, \”Your father is the captain\”, so my sister always wanted to watch airplanes. In order to fulfill his sister\’s last wish, Ming packed her body in a suitcase and buried her near the airport. What\’s more cruel than the movie is that it was adapted from a real incident. In the case, the mother abandoned the five children. One brother died and was hidden in the closet at home. The youngest sister was injured to death by her brother and friends, and the remaining The next two girls were extremely weak from chronic malnutrition. Finally, both brother and mother were sentenced. Whether it\’s a movie or reality, these children who are left at home are facing a hopeless life alone. This reminds me of the left-behind children in our country. Parents in rural areas go to the city to work in order to make a living. The younger children at home are taken care of by their grandparents, and the older children may be left to take care of themselves. As a result, children are forced to leave their parents and start to understand the world on their own early. Throughout my childhood, I was often shadowed by the word \”lack of love\”. There are more than 20 left-behind children in a small village in Bijie City, Guizhou, including four brothers and sisters. The eldest brother Xiaogang is 13 years old, and the youngest sister is 5 years old. Their parents are not on good terms, and they have gone out to work separately. They take care of each other\’s lives. Although they live in a three-story building, have meat at home, and have no worries about food and clothing, these children are not living happily. These children have lacked the company of their parents since they were young, and their parents are basically absent from their lives. They cannot experience a normal childhood. Just like this 5-year-old sister, the care of her brothers and sisters is not equal to the care of her parents, not to mention that these are only a few children around ten years old. Although there were four people, the huge house was filled with loneliness. In the village, the four brothers and sisters usually do not interact with others, and do not like to go out to play with other children. Their personalities have become more and more withdrawn, and they have lost the innocence and liveliness of children. Later, the three older children began to get tired of studying. On the night when teachers and government leaders came to persuade them to go to school, four of them committed suicide by taking pesticides. I saw netizens asking: These children have too fragile minds and don’t have to worry about food and clothing. What can’t they think of? Yes, people who have not had this kind of experience will say: What is there to think about? It is said that the arms of parents are the warmest place. It gives children a sense of security and helps them solve the confusion of growing up. Sadly, even if many parents know that their children need companionship, when choosing between their children and making money, they will still choose to work and make money. They think that as long as they have material things, they can make up for their time with them.The companion is missing. But money is not the same as love. When will we understand this truth? Growing up without love means being abandoned and forgotten for a child. Their psychological cognition is still immature, and such psychological hints often appear. If things go on like this, the impression that \”home is indifferent and the world is ruthless\” will be imprinted in their hearts. Without the guidance of adults, they formed their own worldview. No matter whether it is right or not, as long as it can solve the current doubts, it will be fine. They are not good at expressing themselves and often use extreme methods to express their dissatisfaction and anger. This is not only a catharsis of emotions, but also a proof of self-existence. The four children guard the empty house and the cornfield next to the house day after day. They cook and clean up by themselves every day, and no one urges them to go to bed and go to school. After being closed for a long time, no one in the village bothers to greet them. That\’s how they were forgotten. Before his death, my brother left this suicide note: Thank you for your kindness. I know you are kind to me, but it’s time for me to leave. I once swore that I would not live to be 15 years old. Death has been my dream for many years. Today it is cleared! These words were actually written by a boy in sixth grade. According to the villagers, my brother Xiaogang has a very strange and violent temper. Although he is very kind to his younger brothers and sisters, his temper is really weird. This is not only related to the long-term left-behind life, but also closely related to the education of parents. Their parents were not on good terms and often quarreled, and they would go out to work separately. When he was at home, his mother often beat and scolded Xiaogang and punished him corporally. For this reason, Xiaogang once ran away from home for more than ten days. After he was brought home, he was stripped naked and forced to stand in the sun for two hours. There have been many remarks that left-behind children are most likely to suffer from psychological problems. Sichuan Province psychologist You Deliang once conducted a psychological survey on nearly 400 left-behind children. Among them, 106 had anxiety, 107 had depressive symptoms, and 88 were prone to depression. Angry character. Shockingly, surveys show that crimes committed by left-behind children account for 70% of juvenile crimes. So how many left-behind children are there in our country? The \”Research Report on the Situation of Left-behind Children in Rural Areas in China\” released by the All-China Women\’s Federation in 2008 shows that the total number of left-behind children in rural areas in my country is about 58 million, of which there are more than 40 million left-behind children under the age of 14, with an average of 4 children. There are many left-behind children. In the past 10 years, this number will only rise, not fall. This means that tens of thousands of left-behind children may develop mental illness or even be on the verge of crime. Relationships between people need to be cultivated over a long period of time, especially the relationship between children and the parents with whom they first come into contact. If children cannot receive positive guidance from their parents, their childhood will only become a long and painful growth period that seems impossible to survive no matter what. The story of the four Xiaogang brothers and sisters is very sad and makes many people realize the importance of paying attention to the psychological conditions of left-behind children. In fact, the safety of left-behind children is also very worrying. Also in a village in Bijie, an area with many elderly people and left-behind children, Zhang Xijiu’s 15-year-old daughter and 12-year-old son were murdered at home, and the daughter had been sexually assaulted before her death.invade. What is outrageous is that the murderers turned out to be two relatives of the same race. Seeing that they only had two underage children at home, they were ruthless. The mother of these two children has passed away, and their father is away from home all year round to take care of them. Moreover, the year before her death, her daughter was sexually assaulted by a 60-year-old neighbor, who paid her for only 30,000 yuan. I remember the news I saw on the news channel many years ago. A girl’s parents have been working outside. The girl goes to school on weekdays and lives alone at home on weekends. For a while, the parents could not contact the girl, so they returned home, but their daughter had been sexually assaulted by a neighbor, killed, and thrown into the toilet. Parents are always absent from their children\’s lives for various reasons. Even if you are told that someone needs to be responsible for your child\’s safety, you will still take a chance: \”How could this happen to me?\” But they forget that the plots of TV series are all derived from real life. People are not deliberately selected for accidents. Anything related to safety must always be taken just in case. The problem of left-behind children in rural areas is a long-lasting and difficult to resolve pain. We can\’t blame parents for leaving them at home alone, because parents have to earn money to support the family. If they put down their work, they can\’t support the family, and if they pick up their work, they are destined to be unable to spend time with their children. Whether you choose to have children or go out, you have to pay a heavy price. But I think that before the mechanism to protect left-behind children has been established and perfected. Can our schools work with local communities and governments to establish files on left-behind children? Provide regular psychological counseling and safety education to children. Is it possible for our civil society to exert greater energy to help these left-behind children? More importantly, when can our government really pay attention to this problem and actually save these children? Because compared to most people today, these children really need love and care so much.