These 5 types of families are the easiest to raise outstanding children! The sooner you see them, the better

How to raise an excellent child? The first reaction of many people is to let their children study hard, enter key middle schools and universities, and receive the highest quality higher education. This idea is correct, but many parents ignore one thing, that is, a person is inextricably linked to his family of origin, and this connection may affect his life. Therefore, parents\’ lifestyle, thinking, education and life style will play a decisive role in the child\’s personality, psychology and behavior, and will have a long-term and far-reaching impact. So, what kind of family can raise outstanding children? Families who know how to manage emotions According to surveys, 90% of parents will feel anxious in the process of raising children: How can we communicate better with their children? What should I do if I am too busy and have no time to spend with my children? What should I do if my child’s test scores have dropped… The main reason for anxiety is that many parents cannot control their emotions well. Parents who are anxious for a long time are often sensitive and irritable, and often lose their temper with their children. Children who have been under the negative emotions of their parents for a long time will be affected subtly and become violent and lose their temper; on the other hand, they may not feel the love and care of their parents, encounter difficulties in life and study, and will not Willingness to tell parents leads to estrangement in the parent-child relationship. Moreover, sometimes, being unable to control your emotions can cost you and your loved ones a heavy price. A few days ago, a new mother in Shanghai accidentally fell her 5-month-old child from the bed due to negligence. She was already blaming herself and feeling sad. Not only did she not receive comfort and understanding from her husband, but she was accused by her husband of \”not going to work and not even being able to take care of her children at home.\” In anger, she chose to jump off the building with her children. This mother\’s overloaded anger exploded like an emotional bomb, hurting herself and her infant child. The child suffered a severe craniocerebral injury and is still in danger until now. If a family knows how to control its own emotions and allows its children to grow up in a positive and spring-breathing environment, then this child must also be a person who can manage their emotions, and their relationship with others will not be bad. When he faces a problem, he thinks rationally rather than letting his emotions guide him. Please believe that if you bring wind and rain, melancholy, darkness and pessimism to your children, they will also respond with wind and rain, melancholy, darkness and pessimism; if you bring joy, joy, light and laughter to your children, they will It will also be repaid with joy, joy, light and laughter. Well-spoken families Facebook founder Zuckerberg shared a set of pictures about parent-child education, listing 11 bad behaviors of children, 8 of which are caused by parents not speaking well. For example: If your child If you can\’t stand up for yourself, it\’s because you always criticized and educated them in public when they were young; if your children get angry easily, it\’s because you don\’t give them enough praise, and they only get attention when they behave inappropriately; if your children If your child doesn’t know how to respect other people’s feelings, it’s because you always order them and don’t care about their feelings; if your child is always mysterious, I won’t tell you anything, it’s because you always love to hit them;… In reality, there are countless parents like this. They obviously want to help their children correct their mistakes, but they never care about their children’s thoughts and face, and use others to teach their children. The child\’s self-esteem and sense of security; words of concern that are obviously meant to be well-intentioned, but are expressed in a different way; clearly meant to make the child progress, but \”suppressive\” education is always used to stimulate the child. What parents don\’t know is that many children cannot tell the difference between the lines. They will simply believe what their parents say about them and change it into their own ideas. They will fall into strong self-doubt and self-denial, thinking that they are just like what their parents said, useless, stupid, stupid… Once they accept the labels their parents put on themselves, they are likely to go towards the future. development in this area. Most of the families we see who know how to let go are parents who worry about their children and worry about them in every possible way. They are meticulous in everything and wish they could arrange everything for their children, even considering which university and major to attend. They are like helicopters hovering over the children, monitoring their every move at all times, ready to clear obstacles for them at any time, for fear that they will make mistakes and take more detours. As everyone knows, they can do things for their children, but they cannot grow for them. The more they try to fill their children\’s futures, the less their children will be able to achieve the perfection they demand. Teacher Fan Wei, a must-read lecture for parents, said that the process of children growing up is a socialization process. One of the distinctive features of this process is its practicality. They can understand many truths through personal experience, and parents should provide their children with opportunities to experience as much as possible. If parents interfere in their children\’s lives again and again, do everything for them, and let their children develop according to their own designed track, this will not only deprive the children of the right to self-growth, lose the opportunity to grow independently, but also train the children to become \”gnawers\”. \”Old people\” will also prevent children from feeling the joy of learning and living, and make them feel forced and helpless, making both parties feel painful and suffocated. Many parents claim that they are afraid to let go, fearing that their children will be hurt and make mistakes if they let go. Flowers in the greenhouse cannot withstand the wind and rain. The earlier children become independent, the closer they are to becoming independent individuals and the better they can withstand the wind and rain of life. Believe that there is no child who can\’t adapt to letting go of his children, only parents can\’t. Families who love reading According to a survey by the Chinese Academy of Educational Sciences, families whose parents often read books and newspapers in their spare time have a higher proportion of children with excellent grades. I read an article many years ago. The author went to a friend\’s house and saw that his friend\’s children liked reading very much. Not only did they like fairy tales and stories, they even read a reference book with gusto. He was surprised and asked the parents how they raised him. How was it cultivated? No cultivation at all. The couple usually likes to read books. When they have nothing to do, the whole family gets together to read, and everyone is immersed in their own books. None of this is done deliberately. Parents love it and children like it. They naturally don’t resist and do it happily. From the moment a child is born, he is exposed to this kind of atmosphereGrowing up in Waizhong, naturally, in his view, reading is as normal as eating and breathing. What about in our real life? Many parents ask their children to read more, but they themselves play with mobile phones and watch TV without feeling anything inappropriate. In fact, this will seriously affect children\’s learning attitude. Parents are their children\’s first teachers and the people they spend the longest time with. Their words and deeds will leave a deep imprint on their children in a subtle way. Some parents will say that we are busy working for a living every day, so how can we still have the mind and energy to read? It does not require us to read a lot of books, nor does it force us to read books all the time. At least in front of the children, when the children are learning, we must be with them, even if it is to read the children\’s textbooks or magazines, let the children know that they are They are not fighting alone, let them understand that learning is a long-term thing, and they should learn as long as they live. A family with a harmonious relationship between husband and wife A family must first have a good relationship between husband and wife before it can establish a healthy parent-child relationship. The relationship between husband and wife is the anchor of a family. There is a saying that goes well: The best love a father has for his child is a mother who loves the child well; the best love a mother has for her child is appreciating and respecting the child\’s father. When a mother receives care from her father, the charm of motherhood and femininity will naturally shine through. When a mother praises a father for being great, the father naturally becomes the guardian angel of the children and a role model for learning. Such a harmonious family relationship gradually formed a sunny and happy atmosphere. People who grow up in this kind of family are not only optimistic, but also believe in love and express love naturally, because they know that love is something that comes naturally without too much thinking. Children who grow up in quarrels are very insecure. Loving parents can give children enough sense of security, make them brave, and learn to overcome difficulties and fears independently. Because they know that home will always be their support and safe haven. A harmonious relationship between husband and wife is also conducive to children\’s interaction with others. If parents are loving, their children\’s words and deeds will exude friendliness from the inside out, making them more likely to be approached and respected by others. And those couples who exchange harsh words and fists at each other often produce children who are irritable, restless, and difficult to get close to.