They say it’s easy for American mothers to raise their children. That’s because they all have this magical skill.

My American neighbor is a mother of three children. I have quit my job since my second child was born. She raised the baby alone, and her parents lived on Long Island. The old lady came to see the baby once a month, dressed up and looking good. Because after seeing my daughter and grandson, I also wanted to listen to an opera, so it was purely a \”drop-in\” visit. My neighbor has been very independent since she was a child. She is a stay-at-home mother like me. The difference is that she can take care of three children more easily than I can with one. Often before I go out in the morning, she has already sent Dabao to kindergarten, pushed Erbao and Xiaobao for a run and came back, and also walked the dog by the way. Not many American families have elderly people living with them to help. Most stay-at-home mothers take care of their children and housework independently like their neighbors. Over the years in the United States, I have found that Americans find it easy to raise children not because they are smart, but because they are so \”lazy\”. First of all, Americans raise their children very poorly. I remember that when I started to collect breast milk, I could never control the temperature of the hot milk. It would be hot for a while and cool for a while. It would take me a long time to get it to my baby who was crying with hunger. When the neighbor mentioned earlier makes milk powder for her baby, she just unscrews the water pipe and puts the bottle in the baby\’s mouth. Although you can drink tap water in many places in the United States, I still feel a little uncomfortable with the idea of ​​using tap water to prepare milk powder. But the rough neighbor’s mother always does this, and the baby does not get sick from it. Because I am used to the Chinese stomach, I did not adopt the method of giving my baby milk at room temperature. But I discovered that it turns out that complementary foods don’t have to be cooked for every meal, especially meat-based complementary foods. If you make a few more at a time and freeze them in an ice tray, you won’t lose as much nutrition as if you cooked them freshly. American mothers are also very accustomed to feeding their babies finished solid food, and the time saved can be used to play with their babies. It’s really a good deal when you think about it. Americans\’ extensive care is also reflected in their ability to let go. Since I started planning to have children, every time I return to China, I will pay attention to the families around me who are raising children. We often encounter this scene: the mother is holding the baby, the father is pushing the stroller (because the baby refuses to sit), the grandfather is following behind with toys, and the grandmother is feeding things into the baby\’s mouth as she walks. It\’s a painting style of the emperor going on patrol incognito. I couldn\’t help but start asking myself the question that many people ask: Why are Chinese people so meticulous and anxious about raising children? A foreigner can take care of a baby alone, but China wants a whole family? Later I discovered that this kind of \”follow-up\” parenting is not very common in the United States. A foreigner’s family is also traveling as a team, but the baby is definitely not the center of the team. On the contrary, parents are the backbone of the team. The team has iron discipline, and children need to obey the instructions of adults. They have established a good eating and sleeping routine for their children early. It is rare to see two or three adults feeding the children around them, and they cannot finish a meal of complementary food in half an hour. Besides, unless the baby is sick, he knows how much he eats. If you can feed one mouthful, how much hatred do you have against your baby… Another example is when going shopping in the supermarket. Babies over 8 months old must sit in the shopping cart, which is not to say that they cannot be carried without two adults. This is the situation when the baby goes out. Because of this, American children have been relatively independent since childhood, and it is rare to encounter children who have nothing to do but reach out for food and open their mouths. Secondly, Americans love to use tools. Because \”lazy\”\”They will never do anything that a machine can do. Instead of carrying the baby when going out, they use a stroller; when doing housework, they carry the baby in a sling to free their hands; they encourage babies to eat by themselves and use complementary feeding tools (feeding machines, meal supplements, etc.) chairs, bibs, tableware for self-feeding, etc.); most people use diapers, which is convenient and trouble-free. Mothers who really need to use diapers will also use a washing machine and dryer to clean the diapers, otherwise the newborn baby will have to change more than a dozen diapers every day Frequency, hands can be washed in minutes. In addition to household appliances, nanny is also a tool, but many Chinese families do not use nanny at a high rate. \”Lazy\” mothers in the United States will especially arrange for teammates to participate in raising their children. This point I was lucky enough to wake up early. In the first few months after the baby was born, Su’s father had to do all the things like feeding, burping and changing films at night. Although Su’s father had to go to work the next day, the whole family was very sleepy. Ah, with more cooperation and division of labor, we will slowly get through it. The U.S. economy has been in recession in recent years. Many middle-class people have mortgages worth tens of thousands of dollars. The working-class people cannot save much money after paying taxes and daily expenses. But Americans are really willing to spend money to buy time. They also leave things like washing dishes, vacuuming, and mopping the floor to machines, or hiring part-time workers. Many elderly people in Chinese families think that dishwashers and washing machines cost water and electricity, so they have to wash them by hand. . It seems that everything is valuable, but your own time is not valuable… But the twenty minutes of washing the dishes is one hour for three meals a day. If you \”waste\” a few cents on electricity, you can save an hour. Our family Currently, Dad Su\’s income alone supports the whole family, and living expenses need to be calculated more carefully than before. But after resigning, we decided to continue to use our previous part-time worker to clean the house, and the charge was more than 100 US dollars each time. But washing dishes and cleaning saves money. These few hours out of the house are really more precious than anything else to the busy new parents. With hundreds of dollars less in the bank account every month, if it can bring more sleep to the adults and more company to the children, Then I would rather be \”poor\”. Besides, with the current income level, it costs several thousand to buy a mobile phone, and several hundred to go out to eat. The expenses of buying a dishwasher and hiring a part-time worker do not affect the living standards of most people. There will be no long-term impact. It\’s just a matter of consumption concepts. In the past few years in the United States, I think it\’s easy for American mothers to raise their children, not because they have many skills. When it comes to studying parenting, Chinese mothers are much better at it. But They are very carefree when raising their children, especially \”lazy\” and spend money to buy time. I was influenced subtly, and after practicing it, I found that being a \”lazy\” mother will not harm the baby, but can actually make the whole family happy. The quality of life is higher.