This is the secret that widens the mental gap between children [A must-read for parents over 2 years old]

A few days ago, I went back to my alma mater to chat with my tutor about being a public account. The tutor and my juniors asked me out of curiosity: \”We feel that there are hot topics in parenting now, such as breastfeeding, not eating salt before 1 year old, going to… Don’t go to interest classes, but no one mentions the more important thing for children’s growth.” “Yes, senior sister, many parents are now anxious to send their children to early childhood education classes. And for that more important thing, why do parents But they don’t know?” We laughed in unison, knowing exactly what he was referring to. It is something that most parents are not aware of, but it plays a key impact on the growth of their children. This is \”mixed age play.\” We all know that \”lying\” is a basic ability for a baby. You can say: What should I do if my child can\’t raise his head? Lie down more. What should I do if my baby doesn’t have the consciousness to turn over? Lie down more. How to train children to crawl? Lie down more. But few people know that \”mixed-age play\” is as important to children after two or three years old as \”lots of lying down\” is to little babies. My tutor even commented once: If children could spend more time \”playing with mixed ages\”, 90% of the interest classes in China would be unnecessary. It can even be said that in terms of children\’s EQ and IQ, \”mixed-age play\” can cure all diseases. What should I do if I don’t like to talk? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. What to do if you are introverted and shy? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. What should I do if my child can’t start a topic? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. What should I do if my baby has poor emotional control? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. What should I do if my language development ability is slow? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. What should I do if my child always clings to me? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. What should I do if my child doesn’t like sharing? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. How to develop children’s leadership skills? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. What should I do if my athletic ability is not strong? Find friends of mixed ages to play with. Jack Ma\’s father said in a speech: \”I graduated from Hangzhou Normal University. I sometimes think that if I graduated from Tsinghua University or Peking University, I might be doing research every day now. Because I graduated from Hangzhou Normal University, I have My current experience. Culture comes from playing. Children who know how to play, who can play, and who want to play are generally very promising.\” I checked the experience of Jack Ma Yun\’s father. He is an ugly man who grew up in a rural area. In the mixed-age games, I gained extremely high experience points, developed the ability to fool my friends (leadership), and led the team members to create Alibaba. What are the magical effects of mixed-age play? For children: It can make children smart quickly. When is the best time to develop children\’s intelligence? It is in the \”zone of proximal development\”. The child never comes to meetings, just a little bit. If you give him some guidance at this time, the child\’s potential will be unleashed. Children can quickly master puzzles that they almost can\’t solve, stumbling over a sentence that doesn\’t quite make sense, or instructions that are just one step away from being able to ride a balance bike. If you play with children of the same age, you won\’t have such a good effect. Because the intelligence levels of children of the same age are not much different, it is difficult to see at a glance what the problems are with their peers. Even if they can,, nor can they express it appropriately like older brothers and sisters. Scientists have conducted experiments and found that compared with playing with peers every day, children who play at mixed ages improve their intelligence faster and have better adaptability and learning abilities. The benefits of mixed-age play with my edamame are endless. For example, after Maodou learned how to ride a scooter, he always wanted to adjust the height of the handlebars by himself, but he always failed to use the knobs on the handlebars. Unexpectedly, an 8-year-old girl was adjusting her scooter that day. He watched curiously and started trying it. Who knew he would learn it right away? △On the far left is Edamame. The squatting little girl is 8 years old, the standing little boy is 4 years old, and there are even more surprises. These little friends only have one balloon, what should they do? The 8-year-old girl organized everyone and told everyone: everyone can play for 10 minutes according to their age. Edamame immediately learned the distribution rule of \”Toys should be played in a certain order, and everyone should play in a fair amount of time.\” △Edamame is on the far left. The children are 8, 4 and 3 years old respectively. This is just an hour of \”mixed-age play\”, and the children have learned so many new things. What if it accumulates over time? \”Mixed-age play\” can add points to children\’s intelligence. What\’s the secret? It is the \”zone of proximal development\” that a child can barely reach. Through repeated and high-intensity stimulation and learning under the leadership of older children with stronger abilities than him, the child\’s abilities can improve by leaps and bounds. The so-called \”children who are more playful are smarter\” does not refer to the kind of adult-directed play in kindergartens and early childhood education classes, but to free play with friends of different ages! For older children: It can help older children learn to share and have higher emotional intelligence. Children are naturally resistant to their parents’ preaching, but they are not interested in their friends who are a few years older. Instead, they have a natural tendency to imitate and be close to them. Once, his grandma said to him: \”Modou, you have to share it with other children. Sharing is a good child.\” Maodou flat-mouthed and ran away. Which child is willing to listen to adults’ moral admonitions? However, the change of character occurred after Maodou\’s mixed-age play. Children younger than him also wanted to take his milk tablets, but he was reluctant at first, but later gave him a few tablets. As a result, Maodou, as he listened to the children younger than him say \”Thank you, brother!\”, he tasted the sweetness of sharing and became more and more generous. He feels that he has the responsibility of an older brother and wants to see children happy because of him. Now, he will take the initiative to share toys with others without us preaching. How is the behavior of sharing learned? It must not be just through the guidance of parents’ words! Children must be allowed to face real social situations and realize: \”Although I eat less, I can share the happiness of others.\” Only a virtuous cycle in mixed-age interactions will make children change. Become a child with high emotional intelligence. If there is a mixed-age kindergarten near your home, please give it priority. The last time I wrote the article \”People who have been there tell you the \”insider story\” of kindergarten: How to choose a good kindergarten for your children\”, a mother asked: Are there mixed-age kindergartens and kindergartens near your home? Which ordinary kindergarten should I choose? I didn\’t have time to reply in detail at that time, so I will explain clearly this time. seriousSay: If there is a mixed-age kindergarten near your home, please give it extra points in your selection! There are so many benefits to playing with mixed ages. Your child\’s IQ and EQ speed will be upgraded at double speed. However (big twist!): A truly good mixed-age kindergarten must be significantly more expensive than an ordinary kindergarten! If this kindergarten is cheap, please don’t go! Why? Because mixed age means that children have very different development levels, teachers need to spend a lot of time carefully observing each child\’s abilities and then provide targeted guidance. This teaching task is much heavier than that of ordinary kindergartens, and the requirements for teachers are very high. If it is a cheap mixed-age kindergarten, it can easily become a bustling market, and it will be difficult for teachers to control the situation. High-quality educational resources will not be cheap. It is correct to describe them as “you get what you pay for”. \”Mixed-age education\” has a fundamental effect on children\’s minds. In short, after the child is two or three years old, you must give your child a good \”mixed-age play\” environment. My personal experience: Neighbors’ friends are the best. Their advantages are: visible every day, simple ingredients, and equally qualified parents. Don’t underestimate this environment. It has a fundamental impact on children’s minds. Children may or may not attend interest classes, but mixed-age play is a must! That day I went back to my alma mater and asked the professors at the School of Education. Not many took their children to interest classes, but they all \”thoughtfully\” created opportunities every day to let their children play wildly with friends of different ages and realize their intellectual potential. \”Overtaking in corners\”. Therefore, the secret of “playing with mixed ages” must be shared with everyone!