To establish a sense of security for your baby, these three points are enough!

Sufficient security is really important in the growth of children. An American psychologist who studies \”attachment\” once said: Children who do not establish strong and secure attachment relationships in infancy will lack the ability to establish deep and intimate interpersonal relationships with others throughout their lives. Psychologist Mary Ainsworth also found that children who feel secure are more willing to explore or interact with others, and such people usually have higher social achievements. Children who lack a sense of security will find it difficult to gain a foothold in society when they grow up. The basic judgment of the environment is formed in childhood, generally before the age of 3, and it will be difficult to change later. Most new parents know that they need to give their babies a sense of security. However, it is not easy to establish a sense of security, but it is easy to break it. Inadvertent little things, inadvertent actions, and inadvertent words may hurt the baby, which has caused many mothers a headache. Establishing a sense of security for the baby is by no means as simple as taking good care of his/her food, clothing, housing, and transportation. Instead, it requires parents to make continuous efforts… How to establish a sense of security for the baby? Tip 1: Don’t separate before three years old. Four months to three years old is a critical period for the formation of a sense of security. If adequate psychological nutrition is obtained at this time, the baby will be able to gain a sufficient sense of security, otherwise he may be looking for it throughout his life, and be accompanied by anxiety and lack of self-confidence for a long time. After babies are 4 months old, they gradually begin to get to know their mother or other important relatives. This shows that their consciousness begins to be semi-differentiated and they are able to realize that others and themselves are not completely integrated. However, children at this stage cannot truly be separated from their mothers. In the first three years, children rely heavily on adult care to ensure growth. Once separated from the mother who is the closest to you, you will feel panic. Therefore, children aged 0-3 or 0-6 must live with their parents. If you often stay with the elderly, your baby will feel that home is that of grandparents and grandparents throughout his life. Such children are often lonely and restless inside, and their emotional and IQ development is not as good as that of other children. Tip 2: High-quality companionship For small-month-old babies, parents can talk to the baby more, hug, touch and massage the baby, respond to his cries, sing and accompany him to enhance the baby\’s sense of security. For older babies, parents can play games with their babies, read with them, and spend time experiencing different things with their babies. For children aged 2-3, parents need to observe when the baby needs company and when they need to play by themselves, and provide them with an appropriate distance. When the baby expresses emotions, listen attentively and respond, help the baby calm down the emotions during separation, help the baby solve problems in a timely manner, experience people and things with the baby, and have simple discussions! Love is equal to companionship for children, and high-quality companionship is equal to time. Without enough companionship time, the parent-child relationship will not be thick enough, and sufficient thickness will give children the best sense of security and give them the best spiritual gift. Tip 3: Good communication 1) Don’t always speak loudly to your children, and don’t scare your children. The previous generation has had a great impact on us, so it is easy for us to say, \”The big bad wolf is coming\”, \”The police are coming to arrest you\”, \”You are here again\”\”Mom is gone, mom doesn\’t like you anymore\” and so on, but in fact it is harmful to the baby\’s sense of security! 2) When the child is interested in something, don\’t interrupt him easily. Respect it. If you like something, interact with it when necessary. Don\’t stop it just because you think it is not good for him. Make necessary protection in advance in the space where the child often moves, so as to avoid \”\” Negative language such as \”Don\’t touch\”, \”Danger\”, \”Don\’t move\”, etc., otherwise, the child will think that the world is full of dangers. 3) Have a special time to listen to the child. American education expert Patti Huif Le specifically mentioned that this \”special time\” refers to the time when parents put down other things and interact with their children in a relaxed manner. But it is not about relaxing casually, but it is about paying attention to the child\’s performance at any time, including the child\’s speech, expression, and intonation. , postures, movements, etc., you should act as if you don’t understand the child at all. During this time, let the child make the decision, put down the adult’s airs, let the child control, show appreciation for the child, do not guide the child’s behavior, or even act as a weakling Role. 4) If your child clings to you, let him cling. If he clings to you, it means he feels that he spends too little time with you and needs more of your attention and love. Only open arms and welcome your child\’s \”love\” at any time Only by giving him the greatest emotional satisfaction can he feel that no matter what situation he encounters, his mother will stand with him, thereby gaining a sense of security in the world. For the baby, sense of security What is it? For babies, \”security\” is a sense of trust, which is the baby\’s trust in others and themselves. Specifically, it means the following three aspects: Others: In my world, there will be people as long as I need them. Some people will come to protect me. Self: I am in control of myself (body, mind, and spirit) and I have the ability to take care of myself. Environment: The world is safe and I can explore it confidently and without worries. These three The first level is a progressive relationship. The first one is the basis for the next two, and the starting point of the first one is the closest person around the baby, that is, the parents. When the baby has not yet formed trust in the parents, it cannot be determined. \”Will my parents always be there and will they always protect me?\” Then naturally he will not be able to explore this new world with confidence and ease. Therefore, the order of creating a confident baby is to first give him a sufficient sense of security, and then No matter how much your parents know how to let go, never let go before a sense of security is established. That is not \”exercise\”, that is \”injury\”. A sense of security is the cornerstone of health and happiness. A sense of security is the cornerstone of a person\’s healthy personality. Parents ( Especially the mother) is an important object in the growth process of children. When children are young, if they can give them enough love, continuous, stable, persevering, consistent and reasonable love, the children will experience a sense of security. , and extends to trust in others and the world, and feels self-esteem, self-confidence, and a sense of certainty and control over reality and the future. Maslow believes that security is the most important factor in determining mental healthfactors that can be considered synonymous with mental health. The latest research by John Medina, the world\’s most authoritative brain neuroscientist, mentioned that well-meaning parents always think that their children\’s brains are very interested in learning, but in fact this view is not correct. Every skill humans have has evolved to protect themselves from extinction. Learning ability is no exception. It is not the brain\’s main business. Only when the safety needs are satisfied, the brain can work part-time to learn various knowledge while completing the main job; if it is not satisfied, the brain will have no remaining resources to learn other knowledge. If a child has a sufficient sense of security, her heart will be strong and stable. No matter what setbacks there are in the future, this self-confidence will make her dare to face the unknown. Therefore, love her without reservation. Although the world is not perfect, she can still be unafraid of the changes in the world and the evil people. She believes that there is still beauty and warmth in this world. The parent-child relationship is the first relationship when a baby comes into this world, and it will affect the extension of the baby\’s multi-directional relationship in the future. Learn to give your baby enough security from the inside out. This will be the cornerstone of your baby\’s future success!