The word \”serious\” is probably the word we say most to our children, besides \”hurry up\” and \”don\’t waste time\”. We talk a lot because our children can’t do it and it’s very important, so we keep nagging. But after saying \”seriously\” so many times, does it really work? Will my baby really be serious just because we say we are serious? The answer seems to be no. So, how to develop the habit of \”seriousness\”? 01Is the child’s problem due to “seriousness”? \”Seriousness\” seems to be an all-encompassing catch-all word, and any performance of a child is more or less related to \”seriousness\”. When the child is in a daze – \”seriously\” when the child writes incorrectly – \”seriously\” when the child does not understand – \”seriously\” when the child thinks slowly – \”seriously\” when the child is dawdling – \”seriously\” when the child\’s mind travels – \”seriously\” …However, I feel that the word \”serious\” is not accurate, rigorous and specific enough. If you think about it carefully, if we say it seriously hundreds or thousands of times, how much help does it have in solving the problem? If it doesn\’t help, you must be doing something wrong. Take a look at the following scenes. How much do they have to do with \”seriousness\”? Scenario 1: A child learns something through time travel and suddenly travels back in time and associates it with another thing. Is it appropriate to say that he is not serious? This is a sign of children\’s active thinking, and association often makes knowledge deeper in memory and learning more firmly. Do we say to our children at this time, \”You need to be more serious now\”? Scenario 2: Making mistakes in oral arithmetic. Making mistakes in oral arithmetic is a problem that every child will encounter. Errors in oral arithmetic are probably not a problem of \”seriousness\”, but a problem of proficiency or concentration. If you are not proficient enough, you will easily make miscalculations. If you increase the speed, you will make more mistakes. If the child\’s concentration is not enough and he can only focus for 3 minutes according to the 5-minute timer, he will be distracted in the next 2 minutes. When distracted, the speed will slow down and there will be more mistakes. If we tell our children at this time, \”You have to do your oral arithmetic seriously,\” what problem can we solve? The latest and most complete 2023 [Kindergarten, Junior High and High School] premium VIP course catalogs from famous teachers in various disciplines on the entire network, click to view now! Scenario 3: Difficulty in homework When children encounter difficulties with homework, they often behave carelessly, picking at this and that, and pretending that they are unwilling to do it. It is actually useless for us to tell our children to \”take it seriously\”, because the child has encountered difficulties and he no longer knows how to do it. The important thing is to solve his difficulties. Scenario 4: Children who make many mistakes in copying numbers often misread the numbers in the questions or misunderstand the symbols. It is obvious that the number in the question is 238, but when writing it, it becomes 283. It is clear that the column formula is \”+\”, so write It becomes \”-\”. Many mothers around me are complaining about this problem in their children. It is really a chronic disease and the parents are very helpless. This problem may have an element of seriousness, or it may be an issue with hand-eye coordination. As can be seen from the above examples, \”serious\” is not an accurate word to describe or solve problems in many cases. It is certainly inappropriate for us to use such an abstract, seemingly all-encompassing word to summarize a child’s behavior or tell a child what to do.It can even be said to be an act of laziness. We should deeply study the specific reasons behind each problem, find the crux, prescribe the right medicine, and use the word \”serious\” less to solve the problem. 02 Say less \”seriously\” and tell your children more about how to do it! I will take writing as an example to talk about how to train children to write seriously. Writing itself is not a difficult task, and \”seriousness\” does play a major role. At the same time, I was going through the painful process of easy children changing their writing habits, so I did some reflection. Some time ago, I translated the English written by Easy children when they were 5 years old, and found that it is much better than the English written now. It is clean, tidy and beautiful. It is much better from every angle. I didn\’t realize the seriousness of easy children\’s writing problem before, but recently I found that the problem is quite serious and I have developed a bad writing habit. It is really difficult to correct it now, but it must be corrected. I hope the following two points will be helpful to everyone. The early stage is the most critical, and the second is now when the child starts to write, we need to tell him how to write. This point is not in preschool or early elementary school, but when you start to write and draw with a pen, you must start to implant correct writing habits. It is the best policy to set specific requirements at the beginning and hold the child to high standards so that he has no chance to be careless. If a child shows signs of bad habits, he or she should stop them as soon as possible, with a gentle but firm attitude and no compromise. If you do not correct your child\’s habits in time, but follow the way he is comfortable, it will be difficult to change the wrong habits after 90 days. If bad habits have indeed been formed, we need to be patient enough to accompany our children to find ways to change them. If there are too many questions, don\’t ask too many requests at once, but solve them one by one. If we make too many demands, the child will be annoyed and resist if he cannot do it. We will also lose our temper easily when the child fails to meet our expectations. Therefore, we must be patient with the problems that have arisen and find solutions one by one without putting too much pressure on each other. The writing requirements must be clear and specific. \”Seriously\” is an abstract word, and children cannot actually understand what it means to be serious. We should put forward clear requirements for doing things, tell children what \”serious\” writing looks like, and turn abstraction into concrete so that children can concrete the requirements into behavior. Without mentioning specific requirements, in fact, we just let the children figure out what to do. Many children will most likely do whatever they want in a way that is comfortable for them. This will not actually achieve the results we want. As far as writing is concerned, based on the situation of easy children, the specific requirements I gave him are as follows: – Chinese writing requirements for easy children – correct sitting posture, one punch, one foot, back straight; correct pen holding posture (the teacher taught a jingle ); write one stroke at a time, not consecutive strokes; before writing each stroke, think about the position, length, and structure of the stroke; horizontally and vertically; if you write wrongly or poorly, you must erase and rewrite, and do not write directly. Change; wipe it clean and leave less traces; strive to write every word well, not just write it correctly. WriteThis is true for words, and it is true for other things. The above two core principles are the most important. If we spend more time on these two things, we will save more worry and effort than nagging every day, and the results will be better. In short, my current experience is that it is ineffective to say \”serious\” to most problems. You should talk less about seriousness and more about specific methods, and set specific requirements in the early stage, so as to not give children the opportunity to \”not be serious\” .