What is the most failed family education?

There is such a news: A man in Nanjing returned from studying in the UK and has not been looking for a job for more than ten years. Because of this, his father often quarreled with his son. One day, the father sold the car he bought for his son and smashed up his son\’s house in anger. Such a result is indeed sad. However, in real life, many parents are obedient to their children and allow their children to \”come true to their wishes\”, which ultimately results in their children being unable to gain a foothold in society. French educator Rousseau wrote in \”Emile\”: Do you know how to torture your child? This method is to let him get whatever he wants and let his desire increase endlessly. 01 Children who are over-cared for by their parents cannot grow up and nibble on old people and giant babies. Many people are familiar with such terms, because they are very common in real life. Statistics from the China Research Center on Aging show that in cities, more than 65% of households in my country have the phenomenon of \”old people supporting young children.\” About 30% of adults rely on their parents to pay for their living expenses. Some time ago, I saw this news: A family in Nankai District, Tianjin, whose parents bought a house for their son born in the 1980s to get married, spent all their savings and still owed a debt of 300,000 yuan. As the son\’s wedding was approaching, he asked his parents to give the woman a gift of 60,000 yuan, but his parents could not afford the money. The mother said to her son: \”Are you forcing me to die?\” The son said: \”Then you go and die.\” Essential Family Education: How to Encourage Children\’s Progress and Self-Confidence, 70 episodes in total. This mother really came from upstairs. He jumped and died on the spot. When her son gets married, her mother pays the price with her life, how heartbreaking it is. Some time ago, another piece of news hit the screen: 48-year-old David, a native of Shanghai, has been a top student since he was a child. He studied at Tongji University and later completed a master\’s degree in engineering at the University of Waterloo in Canada. After returning to China 6 years ago, I have been unemployed and living on my mother\’s 3,500 yuan pension. Regarding today\’s situation, this mother said: \”It is a problem with her own education. When the child was young, she took care of everything, making the child dependent on his parents.\” Children who have been overly cared for by their parents since childhood think that their parents are taking care of them. Of course, they have already become dependent on their parents. Their souls have not grown, and when they enter society, they still have no awareness of independent living. Writer Liu Yong said: \”The child does not know how to cherish, because he has become a bird in a cage, waiting for you to feed him every day. He cannot be independent and feels that you owe him, and you should feed him when the time comes.\” 02 Parents cannot do it for you. Children protect themselves from wind and rain. We often say: \”Nine times out of ten life will be unsatisfactory.\” This is real life. However, many children are heavily protected by their parents when they are growing up: when they have conflicts with classmates, their parents solve them for them; in school When voluntary labor is organized, the mother participates on her behalf; if the child hits someone outside, the parents will apologize on their behalf. Such children, as they grow up, will not endure any hardships because of the protection of their parents. I have a friend who is doing business in other places. One day we were sitting together chatting and we mentioned children’s studies. He said: \”I can\’t see the children studying from early to late, it looks too hard.\” This father has always cared about his children and never allowed them to suffer. now his sonI am already in my thirties and have not yet gone out to work. I only know how to play all day long. I also have a student who is usually unwilling to study. His parents asked him to study abroad. He studied abroad in several countries, but eventually returned home because he couldn\’t bear the hardship. Later, when I took the college entrance examination in China, I also failed. Children cannot endure hardship, and they cannot endure hardship in another place. Constantly changing places can only teach children to escape. True love is not about sheltering children from wind and rain, protecting them everywhere, and letting them hide in a \”greenhouse\”. True love should cultivate children\’s abilities in all aspects so that they can enter society independently. 03 Parents cannot give their children whatever they want. Plato once said: \”The cruelest way to treat a child is to make his or her wishes come true.\” I know a parent who has been in business for many years and is very busy every day. She felt that she was busy with her business and failed to take good care of her children. Therefore, when her children were growing up, he would buy them whatever they wanted. Now, her son is in his twenties. He plays around all day long and asks for things from his mother. If he doesn\’t buy them, he loses his temper. The parent said sadly: \”Who would have thought that a child would be like this.\” In life, some parents satisfy their children\’s needs endlessly, causing their children\’s desires to increase endlessly. The final outcome is that parents cannot satisfy their children no matter what. Writer Shala wrote in \”Specially Cruel, Specially Loved\”: \”The love that Chinese parents give their children is not too little, but too much; because they cannot bear their children to experience the hardships of life since childhood, and they do not know how to ask for it at the right time. In the end, they will have a lifetime of hardship and demand from their parents.\” Chinese parents have always been like this. No matter how hard they are, they don\’t want to hurt their children. Even if I save money, I have to buy new mobile phones for my children, and dress them decently… Parents\’ endless giving to their children can only teach their children to ask for endlessly. In fact, no matter how much you love your children, you must also learn to say no while giving. 04 At the end of \”The Road Less Traveled\”, he wrote: \”True love includes appropriate rejection, timely praise, decent criticism, appropriate argument, necessary encouragement, gentle comfort, and effective urging.\” Our purpose in raising children is to help them develop independent personalities and abilities, and ultimately enable them to gain a foothold in society. Therefore, in the process of raising children, parents should not protect them from wind and rain, nor should they do everything for them. Instead, they should cultivate their children\’s strong will and cultivate their children\’s spirit of not being afraid of difficulties and failure. Only in this way can children embark on a successful path.