What is the true meaning of \”boys raised in poverty, girls raised in wealth\”? It turns out we\’ve been doing it wrong all along…

My friend A Dong broke up with Yuanyuan for the simple reason that they were not in the right family. I don\’t understand this very much. Yuanyuan is my junior high school classmate and A Dong is my high school classmate. They have been classmates for four years. I know their conditions well. It was precisely because I felt that they were a good match that I decided to bring them together. Now Yuanyuan complained to me: \”You know how stingy he is. For his birthday, he bought a gift for me online at random. He didn\’t take me to heart at all.\” And A Dong was even more bitter. \”I don\’t want to argue with the girl, but her consumption is too high. My salary should be at the upper-middle level here, but it becomes moonlight every month, and I don\’t have any thoughts about living…\” This can make the couple who have already discussed When people who have been in a relationship for three years choose to break up, the reasons are definitely irreversible. In my judgment, the so-called \”wrong family\” is actually the difference in the concepts of growth that the two received. The tradition of \”there have always been more ladies in wealth, and less dandies in ancient times\” and \”boys are raised in poverty, girls are raised in wealth\” is deeply rooted in the concept of raising children. There is nothing wrong with this concept in itself, but when it comes to parents, it is often misinterpreted: raising a son \”poor\” means crying for the son to be poor and having no money to spend, while raising a daughter \”rich\” means meeting all the daughter\’s requirements. The advantage of this is that boys do learn to be thrifty, but if it is too much, the children will become too money-oriented, overly cautious, and even lack interest in life; girls will become too dependent on material things, squeamish, and will definitely encounter problems in getting along with others. . Yuanyuan and Adong are the two extremes of \”poor\” support and \”rich\” support. \”Poor\” should not mean \”crying for poverty\”. In the era when we were in school, dropping out of school was not a shameful act. On the contrary, giving up school appropriately would be considered sensible. We have all seen similar videos: the family\’s conditions cannot support two children in school, so they have to make a choice (usually using a turntable method), but at this time it is often the \”eldest\” in the family who gives up and lets the family go to school. For brothers and sisters. This spirit has been passed down from generation to generation because it was really poor. Nowadays, as economic conditions have improved, the so-called \”poor\” tradition of raising children is still continued. \”Do you know how hard I work every day? In addition to sending you to school, the money I earn is only enough for your monthly living expenses. How can I have extra money to buy you those useless things? Why are you so ignorant?\” This is A 5-year-old boy mentioned his \”experience\” after buying a toy, which his mother considered a \”poor boy\”. A mother\’s \”crying for poverty\” may cultivate frugality in her children, but it also leaves a huge psychological shadow on her children. The children may never make such \”unreasonable\” demands again, and may become stingy, stingy, or even have low self-esteem… Being \”rich\” should not mean raising a female classmate from graduate school who was beautiful and fastidious. She went to graduate school at the age when we were undergraduates. It is very sad. What makes us even more envious is her consumption philosophy and her unrestrained way of going her own way. There are a lot of luxury bags, high-end cosmetics, and designer clothes in her life… Some brands have never been heard of by Youma… We rarely see her because sheI don’t go to restaurants, I don’t live in student dormitories, and I just leave whenever I want. Maybe she was chatting and laughing on campus yesterday, but today you can see her travel photos in the space. Before and after her graduation defense, the school determined the final date on the second day of her overseas trip. She planned the trip for half a month, but the defense time was only one week. When we thought she would give up traveling for her final graduation, her message was: I will go back to defend myself in two days, and then come back… Maybe this is what is called being rich and willful. Because she often left school, she often received notifications from the school and received corresponding punishments without taking it seriously. Around us, some parents believe that their daughter should be rich, knowledgeable, and have more, so that she will not be easily tempted or deceived by a piece of candy. So I \”enriched\” my daughter in various ways until the child focused too much on enjoyment and got it too easily. If a man is poor, he will be raised for his will; if he is rich, a girl will be raised for her temperament. In fact, no matter whether you are raising a boy or a girl, money and material things are enough. We hope that men will be calm, generous and informal when dealing with things; we hope that girls will be dignified, calm and generous. Let boys try the taste of \”poverty\” early and enhance their immunity to suffering. In this way, when they really encounter hardships and sufferings on the road of life, they will not be hit, but use them as steps forward. It is necessary to cultivate a girl\’s temperament from an early age, broaden her horizons, increase her ability to understand the world, and enhance her knowledge. She should be clear about what she wants and what is truly worth pursuing.