What should you do when your baby is impatient with things?

A mother said that every time she sees her son dawdling in doing things, she can feel the anger in her heart slowly \”jumping out\”. I really want to yell a few times and ask him why he is so slow, can\’t he be faster? But after yelling, you will hear crying, which is even more annoying. What should I do if my children don’t take the initiative to learn? How to make children fall in love with learning. Efficient accompanying reading class. Completion mp3. Before, I was just impatient. After hearing the cry, I felt even worse. I feel like my emotions will immediately spiral out of control. If you lose control, you will definitely hurt your child and you will feel guilty. We all encounter situations like this in the process of raising children. Many times, when I see the little fish crying in front of me, I will feel angry, just like seeing myself crying when I was a child. I didn\’t like this feeling and wanted him to stop immediately. Of course, reason would tell me that the child has the right to cry and let him vent his emotions. Seeing him taking off his clothes and taking a shower, as it was getting closer and closer to bedtime, I couldn\’t help but urge him, with a stern tone, telling him not to waste time. Do I feel this way because I am concerned about my child’s lack of sleep time, or because I am disgusted with the waste of time? After understanding some knowledge of psychology, you will find that we are always impatient with our children, and it is not just a matter of temper cultivation. It also depends on the psychological state of each adult. When you see a child who is dawdling and wants to lose his temper, have you ever wondered why this is happening? And why does the child\’s crying make me flustered, anxious, and seems to be controlled by \”inexplicable emotions\”. Why do your children’s behaviors make you particularly sensitive and concerned? Psychologist Eric Byrne proposed that people as independent individuals often change in three states, namely parents, children and adults. Parental ego state: It is internalized from the behavior of parents or parental figures. It is a lot of experiences gained early in life that are stored in the brain; including \”must\” and \”should\”, the parent ego state is \”authoritative\” \”teaching\”. Child\’s ego state: often emotional, impulsive, spontaneous, and doing things based on feelings. Adult ego state: It is \”logical\” and \”rational\”. The decisions made are based on the collection and objective analysis of data and are not interfered by \”parental state\” and \”child state\”. Why is it so easy for parents to become impatient or even have an emotional breakdown when their children cry? Many times, adults fall into the \”child ego state\”, as if they see their former self, the child who was crying, helpless and scared in front of his parents. This complex emotion can cause emotional fluctuations, making people temporarily forget that they are parents, and have transformed into a child, an impulsive, angry, and emotional child. He has the body of an adult and the identity of a parent, yelling, beating and scolding children at will. We often say that growing up with your children is a practice for parents. In fact, it is such a psychological growth process. Try to maintain your adult self-state and deal with these problems rationally. Of course, this does not mean that children’s self-state is necessarily bad. Because children understand their needs better and are willing to express their feelings to them more directly and emotionally. PlaceTherefore, when you are impatient with your children, you must look at your own self-state. Of course, what is needed more is patience. If you have more patience, many things will change. For example, how do we respond to children’s emotions and needs? A few days ago, in the square opposite the community, a little boy squatted on the ground and cried. In front of him was a shelf full of hydrogen balloons, with various balloons featuring Ultraman, animals and other designs. And his mother carried the vegetables and walked home without looking back. The little boy cried and turned to look at his mother. Finally, the mother turned back angrily, said nothing, took the child and left. The child just sat on the floor and wanted to buy something, and he kept consuming it there. What should you do if your child wants to buy something but you don’t want to? Many parents will say that I chose to walk away without looking back and let the children catch up on their own (actually, I asked the children to give in and obey their parents\’ wishes). Such parents will feel that by doing so, they can make their children more obedient. Because he expressed his firm attitude and would not compromise just because the child was crying. But is there a better way? For example, be patient and tell him why he doesn\’t buy it. Is there too many in the house, or is this inflatable unsafe? When the child persists, stand still or sit on the floor and cry. what to do? Just compromise? If the child has been clearly told why, but he wants to use this method to make his parents give in. You can choose to refuse, but you can stand not far away and look at him. This is far better than walking away without looking back. Because when dealing with small children, you won’t feel relieved even if you leave, and you will still come back to take care of them. It takes the same amount of time. And watching him from a distance, let him vent his dissatisfaction. Then provide comfort and divert attention. At this time, the child realizes that this method is useless and will not continue to make trouble. The results look the same, I didn’t buy it for my kids. Time management methods and techniques: No yelling, no yelling, how to deal with children\’s procrastination and dilly-dallying. But children\’s feelings will be very different. One is neglected needs and emotions, and the other is respected communication. The parents\’ own feelings will also be different. One is to blame angrily, while the other is to nurture peacefully. In fact, it is not that we have never been patient, but have been replaced by anxiety. Many times, I don’t want to listen to my children’s explanations because I think they are making excuses; I also don’t want to respect their persistence, because I think they are just trying to make excuses. Sometimes children come to you to play those \”boring\” games, but you push them away impatiently. Some parents will say, it wasn’t like this in the beginning! For example, when children are young, if something is not done well, parents will patiently say: \”Come on, baby, let\’s do it again!\” with more of an encouraging tone. When the children are older, they will urge: \”Why are you always so slow?\” with a reproachful tone. When a child learns to walk, he will patiently say, \”Don\’t be anxious, baby, come here slowly, mommy is waiting for you!\” When the child is older, if he fails to pass the subject test, he will angrily blame: \”Why is it you again, you guys?\” All the classmates have passed.\” In the book \”Take a Snail for a Walk\” by writer Zhang Wenliang, parents will feel that their children are so similar to this little snail. Take a snailWalking God gave me a task, asking me to take a snail for a walk. I can\’t walk too fast, the snail has tried its best to crawl, always moving a little bit every time. I urged it, I bullied it, I scolded it, and the snail looked at me apologetically, as if to say: \”I have tried my best!\” I pulled it, I pulled it, I even wanted to kick it, and the snail was injured. , it crawled forward, sweating and panting,… Let the snail crawl forward, and I sulked behind. Do you feel like you have the same mentality when you see a child who is struggling? Are you also so anxious when you see your children learning things slowly? When I am impatient with my child, I also want to pull him, pull him, or even kick him. And forget to look at it from a child\’s perspective. How to get rid of children\’s problem of dawdling? Chen Mo’s 30 Lectures on Saying Goodbye to Doing Homework Efficiently. Please remember to be patient when you feel impatient with your children.