Which woman doesn’t smile at her child while her face is filled with tears?

The neighbor across the street is a dentist with very good skills. He works quickly and neatly, looking like a strong woman. Recently, Ogawa went to her dental appointment to trouble her. After a deep conversation, she discovered that she was not as strong as she appeared. She also felt tired, depressed and helpless, and felt that being a woman, especially a Chinese woman, was too difficult. She said that sometimes she felt so depressed that she couldn\’t breathe, and she really wanted to yell and cry. But in the two-point and front-line life between home and clinic, it is not possible when there are patients and colleagues in the clinic, and it is also impossible when there are children and elderly people at home. Sometimes I hide in the bathroom alone and cry silently. But within a few minutes, the child knocked on the door. She could only wipe away her tears immediately, put on a smiling face, and sweetly promised: \”Baby, mommy will be out soon!\” As time went by, she felt that she was about to get sick. Yes, today\’s society has more and more demands on us women, especially mothers. What\’s even more frightening is that we ourselves will accept everything and slowly internalize it into our own demands for ourselves. Be financially independent and have a successful career. When we were young, our parents always taught us that although we are girls, we must work as hard as boys, or even harder, to have our own careers and be financially independent. This concept slowly penetrated into our bones and blood, and \”fighting\” became the fundamental guide for action for me and many female friends around me. My college classmate, a typical strong woman, became a middle-level manager of China Mobile in a certain province very early. I am more than 8 months pregnant and still insist on driving to work by myself every day. My belly is so big that it is pressing against the steering wheel. We were worried about her: \”Why don\’t you take maternity leave in advance? It\’s so dangerous!\” She was also helpless: \”Why don\’t I want to take leave? I feel so tired that I want to die every day, my stomach is so heavy that my waist will break within five minutes of standing, and my feet are so swollen that Every step of the way is hard. But I don’t dare. The internal competition is too exciting and insidious. If you don’t pay attention, the trap may be someone else’s.” However, later she took maternity leave after giving birth, and the project she had been following for a long time was still canceled. Someone else took it. She cried bitterly during her confinement. A perfect mother, one is not enough, two come together. A friend gave birth to a second daughter, and we went to see her together. When I first saw it, I really didn’t believe my eyes. This is still the hot mom with a plump figure, fashionable clothes and exquisite makeup from before! One person was inflated to two sizes; his hair had not been washed for who knows how many days and was as shiny as a hat on his head; his clothes had a strong milk smell, and there were two milk stains on his chest. She used to have to change clothes when she went out to take out the garbage, but now she dares to send her eldest son to a hobby class. In fact, she no longer cares about these superficial things, or in other words, she doesn\’t care anymore. What troubles her most is her eldest son\’s \”hostility\” to her younger daughter. \”The naughty child wouldn\’t let me breastfeed his sister, and he was crying and fussing. As for the daughter, she was crying because she was hungry. I gave him a little scolding. My husband immediately got upset when he was around, saying, \’Why are you taking care of the child? He\’s yelling. . How can a mother teach her children well if her emotional intelligence is so low?!\” She said that at that time, there were really millions of horses galloping in her heart, but when she thought about it, she shouldn\’t have lost her temper or yelled, so what else could she do? Scientific parenting and positive discipline! I had to suppress my anger. But as time passed, she felt like she was going crazy, holding back internal injuries, and seemed to be yelling at her husband and son. Sometimes, while hiding from my eldest son to feed my younger daughter, and watching her eat deliciously, my tears kept falling. When she is serving her husband, taking care of her family, busy with work, and raising her children, a good wife cannot neglect to manage her relationship with her husband and give him meticulous care. My bestie is such a good wife. I feel sorry for my husband who works hard and does all the laundry, cooking, and cleaning. My own hands are as rough as a rag, but my husband’s hands are white and tender. Her husband is a southerner who pays attention to health, so she makes soup and desserts for him every now and then. No matter how exhausted she is after a day of work and raising children, she will still hold her eyes open and watch his favorite \”Star Wars\” with her husband. However, her husband didn\’t appreciate it. He disliked her smelling of oil smoke, her hands being too thick, and her clothes being too vulgar. She devoted all her time to her children, husband, and work, and really had no extra energy to take care of herself or take care of herself. She often felt that she was so worthless. Why did she work so hard? Every time after an argument with my husband, I would turn my back and cry silently. Marrying a person is actually marrying a family, or even a family. My colleague joked that his home is the Beijing reception office of ** Village. My husband\’s seventh and eighth aunts come in batches every holiday. Sometimes the reception capacity is limited, and their schedules have to be coordinated. Accompanying you to eat, play, and go shopping is the most basic thing. When you leave, you also have to prepare a bunch of Beijing specialties and buy a few sets of clothes for your children. Later, she had a child of her own, and it was no longer convenient for her to receive relatives coming to Beijing. After politely declining several times, her parents-in-law were unhappy and said that she was unkind, stingy, and looked down upon others…a lot of unpleasant things. Because of her parents\’ reputation, her husband not only refused to speak up for her, but also criticized her for her faults. She had nowhere to express her grievances, \”I spent so much time and money in the past. I broke my legs and broke my back from exhaustion. I forgot all about it!\” The more she thought about it, the sadder she became. She couldn\’t talk to her parents-in-law. They broke up and made a fuss, but my husband didn\’t understand, so I could only swallow the tears in my stomach. It is said that women nowadays are powerful and all of them are tomboys. You can make your own money, you can take care of your children, you can go to the hospital by yourself… We ask ourselves to be versatile and take care of everyone around us, but we often neglect ourselves; we want everyone we love to be happy, but we often forget to comfort our own souls. ; We often pretend to be strong and happy in front of others, especially in front of children, and tears can only flow in our hearts. A good friend of mine described her situation this way: \”Not only from that day on, the heartache no longer sheds tears, but turns into stomach cramps and twitching of the internal organs, accompanied by a standard smile.\” Life can always be better, but it will never be the same. Can\’t be perfect. Sisters, don’t push yourself too hard. You don’t have to be a strong woman. A mother who doesn’t know how to bake can also be a perfect mother. She loses her temper occasionally and the sky doesn’t fall down. Sometimes she doesn’t dump her husband, so what can he do? So, when you are exhausted physically and mentally, don\’t keep suppressing yourself and let your emotional intelligence go away. You can cry loudly and let people around you know how sad you are. You must find someone to talk to about your grievances. Sometimes, you can lose your temper and vent your anger. Sometimes, you can also escape and give yourself some time and space to breathe freely. If you straighten yourself out, your family will be smoother.