Why are more and more children trying to commit suicide? The reason is this…

When we become adults, we are very surprised by the psychological process of children collapsing and even dying when faced with trivial things. However, if you look back on your own childhood, you will understand that adults\’ neglect of children\’s inner feelings is often the source of children\’s pain. In fact, life and death are just a matter of thoughts. On the way to the amusement park with Xiao Yu\’er and his cousin Xiang in the afternoon, the two children got carried away chatting in the back of the car. Suddenly, Xiang said: \”Oh, sometimes I really don\’t want to live anymore, so I just want to die.\” Xiao Yu\’er also added: \”Sometimes I think so too.\” I was shocked: Why do I want to die? This world is so beautiful and you are so happy now, why do you want to die? The two children yelled: Alas, you adults don\’t know the world of us children. Sometimes when we are scolded by you, criticized by the teacher, ridiculed by the classmates… we will think about it and forget it. It would be more comfortable to deal with it once and for all. Xiao Yuer said seriously: Once, our class teacher asked us: Have you ever thought about dying? As a result, more than half of the students in the class raised their hands. I sighed secretly. It turns out that no matter how the times change, the psychological process of children is always the same. When we were growing up, countless thoughts flashed through our minds, and suicide was one of them. Today, the same is true for our descendants. However, thinking is one thing, turning ideas into facts is another. However, there is only one step between ideas and actions, and we must be vigilant. We used to think that today’s children are much happier than we were back then: toys we had never seen or played with back then, televisions, movies, Internet and mobile phones are becoming more and more advanced, and there are all kinds of food and toys… But we don’t know that in the material world Under the rich and abundant surface, the children\’s fragile pain and despising thoughts of life and death are concealed. A series of child suicides are shocking: On August 6, a 13-year-old Pengzhou girl jumped to her death from the 21st floor after leaving a suicide note. On September 15, a boy of about 10 years old committed suicide by jumping off a building in a community on Changjiang East Street in Hefei. On September 20, a 12-year-old boy hanged himself in the woods of Baipo Village at the junction of Luohe City and Xiping. …In China, about 100,000 teenagers die by suicide every year. Every minute, 2 people die by suicide, and 8 people attempt suicide. A survey conducted in Shanghai showed that 24.39% of primary and secondary school students in Shanghai have had a fleeting idea of ​​ending their own lives, 15.23% have seriously considered the idea, and 5.85% of children have planned suicide. , and 1.71% of primary and secondary school students attempted suicide. A set of data publicly reported by Chinese officials shows that for many years, China has been the country with the largest number of child suicides in the world. In the age ranking of suicides, 12-year-olds account for the first place (40.3%), followed by 14-year-olds (22.7%), 11-year-olds and 13-year-olds (13.6%). In the gender comparison of suicides, girls are much higher than boys: girls account for (72.7%) and boys only (23.7%). Behind the cold numbers is the lingering pain of each family. My little cousin who just entered high school this year said that when she was in elementary school,One time I was beaten because I failed in an exam, so I hid in my room filled with grief and anger. I felt that life was so gloomy and meaningless, so I might as well just jump off the building! Then I opened the window, stood on the windowsill and took a look: Oh, my mother! so tall! It was so scary… I quickly shrank back and went to do my homework obediently. A cousin who is in junior high school said on the side: When I was in the sixth grade, my mother beat me in public because I didn’t cut my hair. At that time, she slapped me in the face, and I was knocked upright and hit the ground. , a thought emerged in my mind: just forget it and make you regret it! However, when my head hit the ground, I said, oh, it hurts so much, it really hurts…, and then I raised my eyes and saw, my mother was actually talking to the people next to me. She didn\’t even notice that I hit the ground, and no one noticed me. Want to commit suicide! So he quietly got up from the ground. Life and death are all in one thought. We are very surprised at the psychological process of children collapsing and even dying when faced with trivial things. Adults\’ neglect of children\’s inner feelings is often the source of children\’s pain. Children between the ages of 3 and 5 already have a self-concept and begin to have a sense of self-esteem; children as young as 10 already know what to expect from their parents and teachers, long for recognition, and feel pressure from the outside world. Everyone has the instinct to escape when faced with stress, and death is the most direct way to escape stress and seek relief. The psychological endurance of children and adults is different. In the face of stress, everyone will have psychological resilience, which refers to a person\’s ability to handle psychological stress. Adults have experienced more things and have strong psychological resilience. They can quickly adjust and recover when they are stressed, or they can rely on other people and things to divert their attention, and they can quickly digest the unhappiness in their hearts. However, children\’s psychological resilience is not yet mature. They do not know how to divert their attention. Many times they cannot quickly digest grievances and relieve stress. Therefore, some trivial matters that are not worth mentioning in the eyes of adults are not worth mentioning in the hearts of children. But it is a huge matter that cannot be solved. There are thousands of ways for adults to solve problems, but for children who are unhappy and have no solution, they often go to extremes. It is only after the tragedy of a child committing suicide that we try to find the reason why the child gave up his life. In the film \”Hanna\’s Last Words\”, after Hanna committed suicide, the shocked and grieved parents wanted to understand \”why she committed suicide.\” So, they recalled every bit of Hanna\’s life. By visiting the school and looking through Hanna\’s belongings, they finally sadly discovered that they didn\’t know anything about Hanna\’s school life, and they didn\’t even know who her friends were. Finally, through the tapes she had recorded in advance, we found out that she suffered a lot of psychological pain before committing suicide – she felt that she had no friends, felt lonely and betrayed, was rumored by her classmates to be a \”casual girl\”, suffered from being betrayed The trauma of rape…but it was too late. Many times, children\’s psychological problems are often noticed by adults only after they are presented in extreme ways. After all, we have not penetrated into the hearts of children. Their inner needs have not been noticed by us. They use their immature strength to support them, but the pressure is greater than theirs.Because of their strength, that’s why they gave up. Bezhmenov, deputy director of Russia\’s Sixth Children\’s Hospital, said: Physiologically speaking, minors\’ physical structure and hormone levels change greatly during puberty, which affects their behavior. Psychologically speaking, adolescent children tend to be rebellious towards adults and may try to prove their independence in extreme ways. We often use the authority of parents to force children to obey us, and we are also used to passing on our own pressure and responsibilities to children. This will make children lose themselves and their happiness. Life without happiness is meaningless. Therefore, when they suffer some setbacks and feel that they are in conflict with their inner self-awareness, they often use extreme ways to prove themselves. Suicide is one of the methods. Ho Wing Hung, director of the Suicide Crisis Management Center of the Hong Kong Samaritan Society for Suicide Prevention, said: In 2016, the youngest suicide victim was only 7 years old, and there were 104 help-seeking cases between 10 and 19 years old, an increase of more than 23% from 2015; The main problems come from parents, including conflicts with parents and emotional distress caused by seeing conflicts with parents, followed by academic problems. Sadly, the psychological root of every child with problems lies in the parents who gave them life. Astakhov, the Russian President\’s Plenipotentiary for Children\’s Rights, said in response to the \”teenage suicide wave\” incident: This is a national tragedy. If this problem is not fundamentally solved, we will lose an entire generation. And for us, as parents who give birth to children, if we lose our children, the trajectory of our lives will change, and there is no possibility of reversal. It is not easy to be a human being, but there is always hope in life, and all difficulties in the world must be faced calmly. For children, we do our duty. Raising a child as an adult always requires a lot of experience and sacrifice, but we are happy with it because they are our children. Therefore, we can definitely learn from the method circulated on the Internet for parents to help their children reduce life and academic pressure: 1) Ensure that children get enough sleep time; 2) Spend at least half an hour sitting next to their children every day to do things or talk together. Companionship will give children psychological satisfaction. 3) Only allow children to choose relevant courses because they like it rather than because of pressure from classmates; 4) If your child cannot go to bed before 12 o\’clock regularly, you should learn more about his academic or interest classes and make appropriate arrangements as soon as possible; 5 ) Extracurricular activities mainly allow children to escape from academic pressure, relax and learn team spirit and interpersonal skills by doing things they like. Make sure your children don’t choose extracurricular activities just to enhance their resume rather than as personal hobbies; 6) Tell your children that you love them for who they are, not the grades they bring home. Tell them: they are your lifeblood! You love them every day, and more people will love them in their long life journey; 7) Tell your children not to use the current school standards to judge their place in the world. Tell them: You are smarter and more capable than you think. You will feel great in college, so good times are coming; 8) Take your children out for hiking, camping or other outdoor activitiesOutdoor activities are a great way to reduce stress. Boys are easy to open up during shared activities such as in the car or hiking. Before going to bed and at the dinner table are also good times to communicate with children; 9) Tell your children that experiencing setbacks and failures is a good experience, and it makes you better prepared to overcome it and come out of it. Be more experienced and confident. So embrace setbacks and failures, because they make you stronger, don’t be afraid of them; 10) Learn to seek help from friends, parents, teachers and other adults, and clearly understand that asking for help is a sign of wisdom, not weakness; every child is The continuation of life is our hope for the future. In many cases, it is also the motivation for us to continue living and fighting. In this case, what reason do we have to hurt them, make them despair of this world, or even give up?