Working mothers are sinners: guilty to their children at home, guilty to their bosses at work

Shortly after Women\’s Day on March 8, a friend who gave birth to her second child felt society\’s \”malice\” toward women. She confided to Qinglanjun: It turned out that she was working conscientiously in the core department of the company, and she was still working overtime until two days before giving birth. When I came back from maternity leave after the year, I was immediately transferred to a worse department. When she raised the objection, the leader looked embarrassed: \”This is so that you can take better care of your family.\” The friend felt aggrieved and angry, \”If I need to work to make concessions for my family, then it\’s not his turn to make decisions for me, right? \”In reality, there are many mothers who are stranded in the workplace, which reminds Qinglanjun of a line in the high-scoring Korean drama \”Misheng\”: mothers in the workplace are sinners, at home they are sinners to the elderly and children, and in the company they are sinners to their bosses. The role of \”mother\” carries the most praise in the world, but once \”mother\” is associated with the \”workplace\”, what they bear is more of a real sense of guilt. Working mothers are “sinners” in front of their children. For a mother who works in a bank, overtime, meetings, training, and back-office work are all commonplace. One time, she got off work at 9 o\’clock. When she came home, the child was not asleep yet, no matter how hard she coaxed him to sleep, it was already 11 o\’clock… She got angry and asked him why he didn\’t sleep? The two-year-old child hugged her neck and said with tears: \”Mom stays with me for such a short time every day, and I can\’t bear to sleep…\” Yes, there is nothing wrong with the child, they just want their mother. The famous host Yang Lan is also a typical career-oriented mother. Even though she has become famous, she still often feels guilty when facing her children: As a professional woman and a mother, I have been confused for a long time, and this confusion still exists today. Still exist. When I was packing my bags to prepare for my business trip, I felt like I had done something sorry for my child. When they were young, I kept asking them this question, does mom travel too much? Should it be reduced a little? Do you feel that your mother doesn\’t care about you? Or can you know that your mother loves you very much? I kept trying to get their reactions, and finally they said, it\’s too annoying, you should go on a business trip and leave. The guilt of working mothers comes from not being able to accompany their children, but also from their children’s sensibility after accepting the reality. Xiao S once said that she once stayed up all night to record a program and it was already morning when she got home. My daughter just woke up and happily asked her to play with her. But little S was so tired that she could only say to the child apologetically, \”If mom doesn\’t sleep now, she will die. If you don\’t want mom to die, just let mom go get some sleep.\” As a result, not only did her daughter He asked his mother to go to bed and stayed at the door to prevent others from disturbing her. Traffic king Mimeng also mentioned that because he was too busy starting his own business, he sent his son Wei Tang to his hometown during the summer vacation to be taken care of by his grandmother. Mi Meng called home every day, and he was watching cartoons and playing with toys, looking very happy. Later, Mi Meng accidentally opened Wei Tang\’s diary and found out that the child had fallen, injured his ankle, needed several stitches, and was hospitalized… Grandma was afraid that Mi Meng would worry, so she pretended that nothing happened, but Wei Tang still cooperated. Grandma acted to make my mother feel at ease. But what is recorded in the diary is still a childish longing for my mother.Dear heart. Every mother cares about whether she has fulfilled her responsibilities as a mother. Once they feel guilty, they will find ways to compensate. Because they know that no matter how much money they make, they cannot make up for the education and companionship of their children. Therefore, the 42-year-old single mother took her child under 3 years old with her when she got out of the car. The mother and daughter spent more than 900 days and nights in the taxi. Another cashier mother took her child to work and let her child sleep under the counter. Mothers who can’t let go of their work, let alone their children. Mothers always treat the world with the utmost tenderness. Has the world ever treated these mothers with tenderness? Working mothers are also \”sinners\” in front of their bosses. I saw a piece of news not long ago: In fact, it is not only difficult for married women without children to find a job, but there are also many people who choose to postpone childbirth or have abortions for job opportunities. In the workplace, being a woman is actually the original sin. Image source: \”Mist\” Almost all companies are wary of women during their childbearing period: unmarried women mean that they need to take marriage leave when they get married, take maternity leave after giving birth to a child, and then take another maternity leave after giving birth to a second child; women who give birth to one child mean that She will need maternity leave at any time to give birth to her second child; a woman who has already given birth to her second child does not have too many worries, but it is very likely that she will not have the energy to work. Data surveys show that when the ratio of men to women in the workplace is 1:1, the proportion of women entering senior leadership levels is less than 25%; 64% of people agree that it is easier for men to be promoted in the workplace, and 71% believe that there is a ceiling in the workplace. The performance is even more severe among women; global women’s wages lag behind men’s by 10 years, and it will take at least 118 years for the global gender wage gap to disappear. There was once a video called \”The Hardest Job in the World\” that went viral on the Internet, telling the story of a simulated recruitment. The recruiter said in the video interview: \”This job is hard and tiring. You stand most of the time. You need to know about interpersonal communication, finance, medicine, cooking and even more knowledge. Sometimes you have to stay up late and have no holidays. You have to be ready to give up.\” Prepare for your own life, be on call 24 hours a day, and the most important thing is that there is no salary!\” When all the applicants expressed that they were unreasonable, the recruiter announced the answer. This \”position\” is mother. The video makes everyone moved by maternal love, but for working mothers, there is a different kind of sadness. Because being a working mother means that you have to do two jobs every day, one is a mother and the other is an employee. However, which boss would want his employees to work part-time outside the company while working in the company? What\’s more, this part-time job is \”the hardest job in the world\”? Feeling indebted to her children, worrying about not trying her best enough when faced with her boss and colleagues, working mothers swallowing many tears alone to survive in the cracks. The U.S. Bureau of Statistics released a set of data on labor force participation rates in various countries around the world. Data show that China’s total labor force ranks first in the world, and China’s female labor force participation rate also ranks first in the world. When you ask a Chinese woman which is more important, career or family, 70% choose both. This also means that 70% of women choose the path of balancing family and career. when a woman goes toSociety shares the financial pressure of the family with men and supports half of China\’s economic development; when women return to the family, they are still dedicated mothers, raising generations of future builders for the society. Society needs mothers to be working women, and families need mothers to be stay-at-home wives. Whether it is to family or career, working mothers have already contributed a lot, so why should they still have to bear the double \”guilt\” of family and career? Inspirational books and chicken soup on the market are always advising women on why they should be a hard-working and beautiful mother, how to achieve a perfect balance between work and family, and how to become a better version of themselves… In fact, they over-advocate that women can be perfect. Balancing career and family is not women\’s liberation, but pushing working mothers from one cage to another trap. Recently, Zhu Lieyu, deputy to the National People\’s Congress, submitted a policy proposal to \”comprehensively liberalize the three-child policy\”, which caused a sigh of relief. Most ordinary families are still thinking about having a second child. From the data point of view, the number of new births in the country in 2017 was 17.23 million, a decrease of 630,000 compared with the same period in 2016. The number of newborns and the birth rate showed a double decline. The harsh fact of population aging is approaching. Increasing the fertility rate is a national strategy for a country\’s sustainable development. But the more realistic problem is: working mothers are still shackles, and the decline in fertility rate is inevitable. Zhaopin Recruitment conducted a survey on the living conditions of working mothers in 2017. 63.8% of women who already had one child did not want to have a second child. So, who is the real “sinner”? Is it a company wearing tinted glasses, or a father who is always on the run? neither. In the final analysis, the social security system is still imperfect. High housing prices, high education costs, difficulty in finding childcare institutions, and lack of supervision of the nanny market are all real obstacles. The rising labor costs of female employees should not be borne solely by enterprises. Population policies have changed, and family structures have changed, but educational services have lagged far behind, and neither have people’s ideas. In \”Qi Pa Shuo\”, Liu Nan, a strong woman, said that she was interviewed together with five male CEOs. The questions the male CEOs were asked were all about users and profits. But what she was asked was, \”How do you balance work and life?\” Why do we require women to take care of family and career, while men only need to take care of themselves? The fact that men are comfortable in the workplace precisely means that \”men do not need to be too involved in family affairs.\” This concept is still deeply rooted. To allow men to return to the family, we cannot rely solely on the cries of mothers. The government, media, and even the whole society should encourage men to return home and take more practical actions. If working mothers have no worries when working hard and have a sense of security when taking care of their families, their children will be healthier and better, and their families will be more stable and happy. All of this is the hope and hope for a prosperous society. backing.