Your child has never said these words to you, but you must know them.

Sometimes, when we educate our children, they remain silent and do not express their feelings directly. However, even if the child doesn’t say it, parents must also understand their child’s “subtext” and understand their child’s real needs. \”I\’m not disobedient, I just want to get your attention. I need care.\” A friend who is a teacher said that there was a little boy in the class who was not paying attention in class and often failed to hand in his homework. He had to notify his parents to cooperate with supervision. . The little boy\’s parents hurried to school. Before their friend could finish talking about their son\’s situation, they were anxious to leave: \”The company is really too busy…\” The friend was speechless for a while, and the little boy who had been standing in the corner cried: \” Mom and Dad really don’t love me anymore!” Sometimes we complain that our children are “disobedient” and “troublesome”. Have you ever thought about why our children behave badly? Although children are young, they are also sensitive, and their ability to perceive love is far greater than we imagine. When he feels left out, he will feel sad and may even deliberately do things to upset you to attract your attention and enjoy his parents\’ care. Maybe your child will never tell you, but his heart can\’t tolerate being left out. It\’s not that he\’s disobedient, he just needs your care. \”I feel very sad when I do something wrong. Please hug me instead of criticizing me.\” While eating out, I met a mother and daughter. The little girl accidentally bumped into the table, and a bowl of soup overturned and splashed all over the girl. The little girl sat there and shed tears of grievance. The mother sitting across from me scolded her while clearing the table: \”Why are you so stupid! You still have the nerve to cry.\” The mother was just scolding and seemed to have forgotten to ask her daughter if she had been burned. It made me sad to see the little girl sobbing with her head down. If a child accidentally makes a mistake, he will feel scared and helpless. At this time, if the parents just blame them blindly, the child may become desperate. My parents are my safe haven, but now even my parents don\’t tolerate me anymore, and I am really immersed in helplessness. The crying eyes of the child reveal the longing for their parents\’ love. When I\’m helpless, can you hug me and tell me it\’s okay? \”There are some things I can do well. You don\’t have to help me. Please give me time and confidence.\” Recently, my cousin found that Dongdong seemed to \”hate\” herself. She used to take care of Dongdong\’s big and small things, but now she doesn\’t like her help. He packs his schoolbag and checks his homework. When his cousin is there to guide him while he is doing things, he will get angry and stop doing them. My cousin felt very sad: \”I wholeheartedly do my best for him, why don\’t I understand?\” In fact, the growth of a child is accompanied by the awakening of self-awareness. Sometimes parents interfere too much, which is not a good thing for the child. Parents must understand that children are growing up slowly, and some things are not bad. Maybe without the intervention of our parents, children will do better. You can\’t spoil your child, and you don\’t have to worry about everything for him. Be a calm bystander and give your child time and opportunity to try and make mistakes. Sometimes it\’s not that children can\’t live without their parents, but that parents can\’t live without their children. \”My grades are not good. It\’s not because I haven\’t worked hard. It doesn\’t mean I\’m bad.\” In \”Little Farewell\”, Fang Duoduo\’s grades declined and she hid her report card without letting her mother know. Later, when she was found out, her mother scolded her. . Fang Duoduo couldn\’t help but sigh when talking about the experience with her friends.Qi: \”I memorize words every day and don\’t have time to sleep. I haven\’t worked hard. Is it bad if I don\’t do well in the exam?\” In reality, many parents believe that if their children\’s grades are not ideal, they are poor, and they even always treat \”other people\’s children\” On the lips. It is no longer true that \”scores determine destiny\”. If your test scores are not good, you can easily label your child as \”poor\”. You may not have thought about how much pain your child will have in order to get rid of the shadow! If your child\’s grades are not good, you have no right to speak, because you only see good or bad results, and there is no \”do your best next time.\” Behind the child\’s silence, you don\’t know how hard the child works for the exam and how hard he works for your hopes. \”Please let me make my own decision. I know better what I want.\” When his friend\’s child was admitted to college, he insisted that the child fill in the application form for a provincial school, but the child refused: \”You have always made the decision for me. You guys have the final say on everything big and small, can\’t I make the decision myself?\” Indeed, he has never listened to the child\’s ideas, and makes decisions for him himself. The child does not seem to have struggled, even if he doesn\’t like it, They all accepted it silently. Are you really sure you know what your child wants? Do everything according to what you think is okay, but forget that children also have their own ideas. You know, your life experience cannot be applied to your children. Don\’t confuse \”advice\” and \”decision\”. Children need guidance and advice from their parents in life, not endless choices. Put the decision-making power in the hands of your children and let them learn to take responsibility for their own lives from now on, instead of hiding behind their parents and following in their footsteps. There is a saying that education is not about managing or ignoring. It is \”watching\” between managing and ignoring. In the process of educating children, we give full play to the role of parents and often forget to listen to the children\’s voices. The child may not have said these words to you, but the child\’s heart is shouting all the time. There are some words that I don\’t want to say, but I hope you understand. Parents should be the closest people to their children. Don’t let your children drift away from you just because you want to bind them with love!