Your family environment is closely related to your child\’s growth

Mr. Cai Yuanpei once said: \”Family is the first school in life. The character of a lifetime, the so-called ever-changing character, is probably embryonic in the family.\” What kind of soil will produce what kind of flowers. The family environment and the words and deeds of parents will subconsciously determine the future of their children. As a saying goes, the daily life of the original family hides what the child will look like 20 years later. A messy family cannot raise promising children. Harvard Business School once conducted a study and found that: \”Successful people with a strong sense of happiness tend to have very clean and tidy home environments; while unfortunate people usually live in messy and dirty environments.\” In a home with messy items, you cannot raise children. Well-organized kids. A primary school teacher told such a story. There is a boy in the class whose grades are always at the bottom, he is lazy and has no motivation. When the teacher went to visit her home, she opened the door and was shocked by the scene in front of her. The coffee table was filled with leftover takeout boxes, cigarette butts and scraps of paper were scattered everywhere on the floor, and the sofa was also piled with dirty clothes. The child\’s study room was converted from a utility room, filled with express boxes, and the desk was also a mess. Everywhere you look, no place is clean and tidy. The teacher couldn\’t help but sigh, feeling suffocated even if he stayed here for 10 minutes, let alone expecting the children to study hard in such an environment. Living in a messy environment has a very different impact on children\’s growth than living in a neat and orderly environment. The former will only destroy the child\’s attention, while the latter will increase the child\’s happiness. Zeng Guofan\’s family has passed down from generation to generation the \”Eight Character Keys to Managing a Family\”: morning, sweep, test, treasure, book, vegetables, fish, and pig. Among them, \”sweep\” means cleaning. Every morning, Zeng Guofan would get up early, clean all the rooms with his children, and then sit down to read. In this way, it not only cultivates the habit of hard work in children, but also provides children with a spacious and bright reading environment. Under the influence of a good family atmosphere, Zeng Guofan\’s sons are all very promising. The eldest son Zeng Jize became a diplomat, and the second son Zeng Jihong became a mathematician. Bian Yuechun said: \”Creating a clean and tidy environment not only makes people feel happy, but also cultivates children\’s sense of spatial order, rational logical thinking, concentration, time planning ability, and aesthetic ability.\” The environment of the home is always present. It affects children\’s learning status and quality of life all the time. As a parent, only by creating a clean and tidy environment for your children can you give your children a steady stream of motivation and energy. Families with disordered routines cannot raise self-disciplined children. Someone online asked, what does it feel like to have parents who can stay up late than you? One netizen replied: \”My dad stays up late every day. I feel that he is the kind of person who gives up on himself in life. He has a great influence on me, so I am not used to going to bed early at home.\” Parents are a mirror for their children. , the child\’s behavior is a reflection of the parent. The current results of children are actually the causes planted by their parents. A student of Qian Zhiliang, a professor at Beijing Normal University, has been asked by his mother to go to bed early and get up early since he was a child. Usually no later than 9:30 in the evening, and she will be woken up before 8:00 in the morning for breakfast. When it\’s bedtime, parents will go to the bedroom on time to go to bed and never stay in bed the next morning. thisThis habit started when she was in elementary school and continued until she went to college. She has always been a little disgusted with her mother. She couldn\’t watch more TV series at night, and it was impossible to sleep in in the morning. But when she went to college and saw that many of her classmates had reversed day and night and disordered schedules, but she still insisted on going to bed early and getting up early, studying and living in an orderly and planned way, she suddenly understood what her mother meant. In order to let their children develop the habit of going to bed early and getting up early, many parents have tried many methods, but the final results are often unsatisfactory. Just because many parents ignore a key factor: Is their schedule regular? What kind of work and rest habits parents have, what kind of work and rest habits their children will develop. The children of self-disciplined parents are basically not lazy; it is difficult for parents who are not self-disciplined to raise conscious children. A family without rules cannot raise grateful children. French educator Rousseau once said: \”Do you know what method you can use to make your child an unfortunate person? This method is to be obedient to him.\” The greatest sorrow of parents is to give everything but raise a child. A child who cannot be grateful. Some time ago, I saw some shocking news. A 35-year-old man in Wenzhou asked his parents for money to buy a new mobile phone. When his parents refused, he threatened to kill them. The answer to every child\’s problem can be found in his parents. After the interview, the reporter found that in order to make their children live a comfortable life, the old couple always tried their best to meet all the children\’s needs in material terms. After graduating from college, the man has refused to work and is content to stay at home, and the couple has chosen to acquiesce. Unexpectedly, the parents\’ obedience was replaced by their son\’s selfishness and indifference. If parents do not set rules for their children since childhood and do not have bottom-line satisfaction, their children will become ungrateful white-eyed wolves when they grow up. As it is said in the book \”Rules and Love\”, children who grow up in love without rules lose their gratitude. A home must have both warmth and rules. Only when love and rules go hand in hand can we raise a well-educated and grateful child. There is a wonderful metaphor: raising children is like flying a kite, you want it to fly high but also to keep it from spinning. The rule is that line. Children can go to a vast world, and the meaning of rules is to allow them to keep their true intentions and be pure throughout their lives. A family that quarrels cannot raise happy children. On Zhihu, I read a short story shared by a netizen. As long as she can remember, her parents have often quarreled, and when serious, they would get into violent fights. The breakdown of her parents\’ relationship had a great impact on her character, making her timid, withdrawn and cowardly. After working, this personality made her feel out of place in the company and she did not dare to interact with others too much. The latest research in the \”Journal of Social and Personal Relationships\” shows that children who live in families where parents argue about trivial matters of daily life will be overly vigilant and anxious when they grow up, and may even affect interpersonal communication. As a parent, the best gift you can give your children is a happy and harmonious family. Mr. Yang Jiang recalled the relationship between her parents and said that she had never heard her parents quarrel once since she could remember. Her parents are more like old friends who have been together for many years, and they always have endless things to talk about together. Father respects and cares for mother, mother treats father speciallyLi Duxing expressed understanding and support. This kind of equal and mutually loving relationship between husband and wife was rare in that era. Influenced by their parents\’ relationship, Yang Jiang and Qian Zhongshu became very affectionate after they got married. Yang Jiang was virtuous and gentle, and strongly supported Qian Zhongshu\’s career. Qian Zhongshu was also considerate of Yang Jiang. And their love also infected their daughter Qian Yuan. Qian Yuan once said this to Yang Jiang affectionately: \”I have always felt that children with loving parents are very lucky, so I am especially grateful to my parents. Because you love each other and play in harmony, I feel that I am a particularly lucky child. .\” Qian Yuan grew up in the love of his parents and knew how to love someone and how to run a family since he was a child. I have seen a very interesting formula: parental love = family harmony = happy life = sense of security = good child. What kind of family, what kind of person is created. Children\’s educational psychology e-book Adlerian psychology book download ultra-clear PDF Parental love is the best nourishment for children\’s happiness. ▽Educator Makarenko said: \”The family is the most important place. At home, people move towards social life for the first time.\” The impact of the family environment on children is the most direct and far-reaching. A clean, self-disciplined, warm and loving home environment allows children to develop good habits and gain healing energy for a lifetime. Give it a thumbs up and encourage all parents.